Perfect Strangers Episode Guide

EPISODE 113 - Speak, Memory

First Air Date: February 8, 1991
Filming Date: January 18, 1991
Nielsen Rating: 15.5 HH

Co-Producer: Alan Plotkin
Created by: Dale McRaven
Written by: John B. Collins
Directed by: Judy Pioli

Cast:
Bronson Pinchot: Balki Bartokomous
Mark Linn-Baker: Larry Appleton
Melanie Wilson: Jennifer Lyons
Sam Anderson: Mr. Sam Gorpley

Guest Cast:
Marla Adams: Mrs. Catherine Lyons
John Drayman: The Waiter

speakmemorygrab03.jpg (40705 bytes)Dimitri Appearances: Dimitriís photo can be seen on the bookcase.

Balki-isms:
"You jump to absurd contusions . . . "
" . . . you start to diaper-ventilate . . . "
"Oh, youíre memory bank is no longer overdrawn."
"Let me just check and see if your pupils are annihilated."
"We go everywhere together.  Weíre insufferable."

Donít be ridiculous: Not said in this episode.

Other catchphrases used in this episode:
Balki makes a comment that goes, "Well, something something and call me something," in this case, "Well, paint me gold and call me Oscar!"
"Jerks."
"Oh my Lord!"
"Oh God!"
"I have . . . a plan!"

Other running jokes used in this episode:
Larry has a plan
Balki hugs someone when meeting them for the first time

Notable Moment: Larry meets Jenniferís mother, Catherine Lyons

Songs: "Moon River" - Larry gargles and Balki sings part of the song

Interesting facts:
-
The title of this episode, Speak, Memory, is the title of an autobiographical memoir written by Vladimir Nabokov and covers his life living in pre-Revolutionary Saint Petersberg in the first half of the twentieth century.  It should be noted that one of the characters in the book is named Dmitri!
- Larry gets a book thrown at him from an irate sports department worker when he says they should devote more space to American Gladiators.  The competition series was wildly popular when it debuted in 1989 and continued to run until 1996.  Back then the show was done in a tournament style with competitors going head-to-head in outrageously wild events which tested the physical prowess and agility of the participating contestants.  An all-new version of the show aired in NBC in 2008. You can visit the official website for American Gladiators by clicking here.
- Larry's impressive tumble down the stairs has often caused fans to ask if Mark did that stunt himself.  It's actually the work of a stuntman and some very astute editing.  Judy Pioli explained to the audience during the filming how the stunt was done.  Apparently the majority of the fall was done (or would be done) by a stuntman but not in front of the audience.  But Mark did tumble down the last part of the stairs to land on the floor, an impressive pratfall in and of itself!

- At one point, Larry asks Balki if there were some reason he were dressed like The Cisco Kid.  The Cisco Kid was the creation of O. Henry and first appeared in one of the writerís short stories, although in that version he was non-Hispanic and an outlaw.  When the character was adapted for a movies (and later a popular radio series, as well as comics and television) he became a Mexican caballero who, along with his sidekick, helped those in need.
- The exterior of the restaurant seen in this episode is the same one used in many previous episodes, starting with The Karate Kids.  In that episode the place was called Edwardís.  Over the course of the series that restaurant changed hands many, many times.  In this episode it is called Caulfieldís. Itís amazing these places keep changing over since they seem to be popular, although since we keep seeing the same people walking into the restaurant in all the different incarnations, maybe those few people were their only customers!
- Marla Adams, who played Jenniferís mother in this episode, is a veteran of television and film.  She first appeared in the 1961 movie Splendor in the Grass.  Known for appearing on soap operas, she played Belle Clemens on The Secret Storm from 1968 to 1974.  Her television credits include appearances in General Hospital, Adam-12, Starsky and Hutch, Marcus Welby, M.D., The Streets of San Francisco, Emergency!, The Love Boat, Hart to Hart, Happy Days, Hill Street Blues, Whoís the Boss?, Matlock, The Golden Girls, Baywatch, Nash Bridges, Days of Our Lives and Walker, Texas Ranger.  In  2008 she reprised her role as Dina Mergeron Abbott on The Young and the Restless, which she had played throughout part of the 1980's, for a three episode story arc.
- John Drayman, who appeared very briefly as the waiter in this episode, does not have too many television credits to his name.  But the residents of Glendale, California, are familiar with his current work, as he is their current mayor!


Synopsis:
The episode begins in the apartment.  Balki is sitting at the dining table doing his homework and Larry gets a plate of chicken from the refrigerator.  He takes a wing and walks to Balki, asking, "Howís the English homework coming, Balki?"  "Oh, itís coming along real good," Balki reports.  Larry takes a bite of the chicken and Balki watches with surprise, then exclaims, "Well, paint me gold and call me Oscar!  I thought you said youíd never eat Myposian food again after you found out I make my shoe-fly pie with real shoes and real flies."  Larry looks worried and asks, "This is Myposian food?"  "Yes, itís Moon Chados Stiki Chiki Bizzi Buzz Buzz," Balki explains.  "Moon Chados Stiki Chiki Bizzi Buzz Buzz?" Larry asks.  "That means Ďhoney glazed chicken,í" Balki explains.  "Thatís all this is?" Larry asks, "Honey glazed chicken?"  "Thatís all it is," Balki assures him.  "Well, itís terrific," Larry smiles, and he keeps eating.

There is a knock at the door and Larry turns to answer it.  "Yeah, the . . . the secret is to cut the sweetness of the honey with the tartness of yak bile," Balki adds.  Larry looks disgusted and almost drops the chicken, hurrying back to the kitchen counter to drop the wing on the plate and wipe his tongue with a paper napkin.  After knocking again, Jennifer enters and sees Larry, then closes the door and hurries to him.  "Oh!  Larry, I have to talk to you!"  "Well, Jennifer, whatís wrong?" Larry asks.  "I have terrible news," Jennifer says, "My motherís coming to town and she wants to meet you."  Balki walks over to Larry as Larry says, "Well, Jennifer, Iíd love to meet your mother."  "But, Larry, you donít understand," Jennifer says, "Mother doesnít think anyone is good enough for me."  "Well, then sheíll like Cousin Larry," Balki points out, "He donít think heís good enough for you, either."  "Balki, youíre not helping," Larry notes.

"Larry, Iíd marry you even if mother didnít like you but it would be so much better if she did," Jennifer explains, "Then I wouldnít have to defend you all the time."  "Jennifer, donít worry," Larry assures her, "You forget . . . Iím a reporter; a wordsmith, a weaver of verbal magic.  Iíll make your mother think Iím the most wonderful guy in the world, then weíll be married and the truth wonít matter!"  "Well . . . youíre right.  I mean, what was I so worried about?" Jennifer realizes, then she takes Larryís hand and walks back to the door, "Oh Larry, what could mother possibly find wrong with you?  I mean, youíre not at all like the other men I used to date.  Youíre not always stopping to sign autographs like the baseball player.  Not always being called away like the heart surgeon.  Not always being summoned to the White House like the Congressman."

"Heís not always lugging that Heisman trophy around like the football player," Balki adds.  "Oh, Larry, I feel much better!" Jennifer smiles, and she gives him a kiss.  "Now donít worry," Larry insists, "Youíre mother is gonna love me!"  "Bye, Larry," Jennifer smiles and she hurries away.  "Bye bye," Larry smiles and he closes the door.  The second the door is closed Larry cries, "Balki, what am I gonna do?  Her mother hated a Congressman!"  Balki suddenly slaps Larry on the cheek, much to Larryís surprise.  "Why did you do that?" Larry asks in a hurt tone.  "Cousin, I had no choice," Balki explains, "You know how these things always end.  You jump to absurd contusions, you paint an outlandish picture of what your life would be like, you get hysterical, you start to diaper-ventilate and then who has to slap you and just bring you back to reality?  I do.  Well, tonight I donít have time for the full-length version.  Iíve got participles dangling over there so I just cut to the chase."

Balki turns to walk back to his homework but Larry grabs his arm to stop him.  "Balki . . . donít you see whatís happening here?"  "Cousin . . . donít make me do this," Balki warns.  "Balki, her mother hated a big-league ball player!" Larry cries, "I didnít get a hit in three years of Little League!"  "Cousin, Iím gonna . . . " Balki struggles to hold back from slapping Larry again, saying, " . . . just donít make me do this . . . "  "Balki, I am doomed," Larry sighs, "I donít have a prayer."  His face suddenly brightens.  "A prayer!  Thatís it!  Iíll become a priest!  All the world loves a priest!"  He thinks and says, "No, thatís not it.  All the world loves a clown!  Iíll become a clown!"  Balki slaps Larry again.  "Youíre right . . . I shoulda listened when you slapped me the first time," Larry says.  "Oh po po po po!" Balki sighs, "Appletoniki babasticki, Bartokomouki gullibliki hullabalooki . . . "  Balki stomps into his bedroom as he continues to mumble in Myposian under his breath.  A moment later he walks back out and slaps Larry once more before going back to his room again.  Larry stands holding his sore face and looking confused.

The next day at the Chronicle, Balki is at his worktable sorting the mail.  Mr. Gorpley steps out of his office with an envelope and approaches Balki.  "Bartokomous, I told you before . . . all letters from my ex-wife are supposed to be filed . . . here."  Mr. Gorpley picks up a garbage can and drops the letter into it.  "Iím sorry, Mr. Gorpley," Balki offers, "I . . . I never would have guessed it was from your ex-wife.  Usually her letters come through the window tied to a brick."  The telephone on Larryís desk rings.  "I better get that," Balki says, crossing over to the phone, "Cousin Larryís upstairs with his friends in the Sports Department."  Balki picks up the receiver and says, "Hello . . . Cousin Larry Appletonís desk.  Oh hi, Jennifer!"  Balki sits on the edge of the desk as he says, "No, Cousin Larryís not here.  Uh . . . I donít know why heís never around when your life is falling apart.  Oh . . . okay.  Okay . . . Iíll tell him.  Bye."  Balki hangs up the phone and look worried.

"Bad news for Appleton?" Mr. Gorpley asks anxiously, then he smiles and says, "I love bad news."  "Well, then youíre in for a treat," Balki says, "Jenniferís mother is coming to town earlier than expected and so Cousin Larry has to have dinner with them tonight instead of Thursday and I hope he donít get too upset.  He donít adjust to change very well."  Larry appears at the top of the stairs talking to someone on the other side of the doorway.  "Yeah, well, if you were any kind of Sports Department youíd give more coverage to American Gladiators."  Larry ducks just as a book flies over his head, barely missing his head.  Larry straightens his tie and sighs, "Jerks," then heads for the stairs.  "Hey, Appleton, your girlfriend called," Mr. Gorpley announces, "You two are having dinner with her mother tonight."  "Tonight?" Larry gasps, then cries out, "Tonight?"  Mr. Gorpley nods with a smile.  Larry starts down the stairs but trips and then rolls head over heels to the first landing and then down the remaining stairs to the basement floor where he lands with a thud.  Balki and Mr. Gorpley run to Larry to help him up.  "Cousin!  Cousin!" Balki cries, "Are you all right?"  They pull Larry to his feet.

"Well of course heís all right," Mr. Gorpley insists, "He landed on his head."  "I think Iím all right," Larry says, reaching to feel the back of his head, "I . . . ow!"  "Cousin, where does it hurt?" Balki asks, and he grabs the back of Larryís head, causing him to cry, "Ow!" even louder.  Larry stares at Balki with a blank expression and asks, "Who are you?"  "Cousin . . . do you remember me?" Balki asks worriedly.  "I donít remember anything," Larry says.  "Nothing?" Mr. Gorpley gasps.  "Nothing," Larry confirms.  "Then you owe me twenty bucks," Mr. Gorpley says, then he reaches for Larryís pocket and says, "Iíll just take it out of your wallet."  "Mr. Gorpley!  This is no time to discuss Cousin Larryís debts!" Balki cries, "I have to get him to the hospital."  Balki tries to lead Larry to the parking garage but Larry stops him, saying, "W . . . wait . . . hold it, hold it.  Aw come on, I . . . I can get to the hospital myself."  Larry looks around a moment then asks, "How do I get outta here?"  "Oh Cousin," Balki sighs, "Iíll take you to the hospital myself.  Where did you say it hurt?"  As Balki leads Larry to the parking garage he grabs the back of Larryís head again.  "Well, I . . . ow!" Larry cries.  As they exit to the parking garage, the scene fades to black.

Act two begins later in the day when Balki and Larry return to the apartment.  Balki opens the door and motions for Larry to enter, which Larry does with a blank look on his face.  "Is your . . . is your . . . is your headache gone?" Balki asks as he closes the door.  "Yeah," Larry replies quietly.  "Okay," Balki prompts, "your name is Cousin Larry Appleton . . . Cousin Larry Appleton.  Now you."  "Uh, my . . . my name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry mimics, copying Balkiís usual pronunciation of his name exactly.  "Relax the jaw," Balki coaches, "Relax the jaw."  "Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry repeats, making the pronunciation even more slurred. "Cousin Larry Appleton," the both say again in the same way. "Hello," Balki prompts, "My name is Cousin Larry Appleton."  "Hello, my name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry parrots.  "How are you?" Balki prompts.  "Fine," Larry answers instead.  "No," Balki sighs.  "Youíd think my own name would sound familar," Larry sighs.  "Well, Cousin, donít worry about it," Balki says as he leads Larry to the couch, "The . . . the . . . the doctor said your own memory will . . . will come back in . . . in just a . . . a few hours.  He . . . he x-rayed your head and found nothing."

Balki and Larry sit down.  "He said . . . he said youíre fine . . . youíre just fine . . . you . . . youíve never been better except you donít know who you are from a hole in the ground," Balki finishes, ending in near sobs.  "My name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry starts to say again and Balki joins in to help him.  "Good, good!" Balki encourages, "And relaxing the jaw."  "My name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry repeats with his jaw hanging loose.  "Hello," Balki prompts, "My name is Cousin Larry Appleton."  "Hello, my name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry mimics simultaneously.  "How are you?" Balki prompts.  "Fine," Larry answers instead.  "No," Balki sighs with frustration and he starts to sob again.  "I . . . I know my name but . . . but I . . . I donít know anything else," Larry explains, "I . . . I donít know where I . . . I live or where I work . . . I mean . . . tell me about me."  "Oh, where does one begin?" Balki sighs, then offers, "Uh, you were born in Madison, Wisconsin.  You live in this apartment."  Larry looks around.  "Iím your best friend," Balki adds, and he puts his arm around Larryís shoulders and smiles.  Larry stares at him with a blank expression.  Balki removes his arm from Larryís shoulders.

"You work at the Chicago Chronicle," Balki continues, "And . . . when you think no one is listening you gargle to the tune of ĎMoon River.í"  "I gargle to the tune of ĎMoon River?í" Larry asks in disbelief.  "Yeah," Balki nods.  Suddenly Larry says, "Wait a minute!  W . . . wait a minute!  I think Iím starting to remember . . . do we . . . do we work with a man named . . . named . . . Mr. . . . Mr. . . . Mr. Porkly?"  Balki starts massaging Larryís temples to help him remember.  "Mr. . . . Mr. Headly?" Larry guesses.  "No, just . . . " Balki encourages.  "Mr. Gorpley!" Larry remembers.  "Yes!  Yes!  Yes!" Balki cries excitedly.  "Oh!  Oh!" Larry gasps, grabbing Balkiís hands, "and . . . and . . . and Iím Larry Appleton and . . . and this is our apartment and youíre Balki."  "Yes!  Yes!" Balki says happily, "Oh Cousin!  Oh, youíre memory bank is no longer overdrawn.  This is wonderful!  Oh boy!"  "Woo, what a relief!" Larry sighs.  "Oh, Cousin, itís so good to have you back," Balki smiles.  "It is good to be back," Larry assures him.  "Hey, Iím gonna make you a nice strong cup of coffee," Balki says.  "I love strong coffee," Larry smiles.  "Well, I know you do," Balki replies, and he goes to the kitchen to make the coffee.

Larry laughs and sighs, "Oh boy.  I . . . I must have taken quite a spill!  For a minute there I . . . I couldnít remember anything.  Well . . . born in Madison, work at the Chronicle, gargle to ĎMoon River.í  Itís all back.  Hoo!  Boy . . . the human brain is one amazing little gizmo."  Balki returns and sets down a little tray with a coffee cup on the coffee table.  Balki sits next to Larry and stirs the coffee, then hands it to Larry and asks, "Sugar?"  "Who are you and why are you calling me sugar?" Larry asks.  Balki stares at Larry a moment and then starts to cry, moaning, "Youíve lost it again."  "Lost what?" Larry asks, then his eyes open wide and he asks, "Who am I?  Who are you?  Is . . . is there some reason youíre dressed like the Cisco Kid?"  "Iím trying to make a fashion statement," Balki states, "But quite clearly itís wasted on you."  "Well, I . . . Iím sorry if I insulted you but I . . . I . . . I donít remember who I am," Larry admits nervously, "And I donít know if I ever will!"

"Now, Cousin, just donít worry," Balki insists, "The doctor said that your memory might go away and come back a few times before you get it back for good.  He said it happens all the time to people testifying before Congressional committees."  "Iím testifying before Congress?" Larry cries, "W . . . what have I done?  W . . . what did I do?"  "No, no," Balki says, "Calm down.  Calm down.  Calm down."  Balki breathes deeply and motions for Larry to do the same.  Larry takes a few short sniffs.  "Okay now . . . your name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Balki begins again.  "My . . . my name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry mimics.  "Come on, relax the jaw," Balki encourages, "My name is Cousin Larry Appleton."  "My name is . . . my name is Cousin Larry Appleton," Larry parrots simultaneously.  "Cousin Larry Appleton," the say together.  "Hello," Balki prompts, "My name is Cousin Larry Appleton."  "Hello," Larry mimics, "Hello, my name is Cousin Larry Appleton," and Balki joins him at the end.  "How are you?" Balki prompts.  "Fine," Larry answers instead.  "Oh," Balki sighs with frustration, and then he takes a couple of deep breaths, then begins again with, "Okay . . . you were born in Madison, Wisconsin."  "I . . . I work at the Chicago Chronicle," Larry recalls, "and I . . . . "  Larry tilts his head back and starts gargling ĎMoon River.í  Balki listens, and then sings along with him, "Weíre after the same rain . . . "

"I got it!" Larry cries, "I remember!  I remember!  No, I . . . Iím Larry Appleton, I . . . I was born in Madison, Wisconsin, I work at the Chronicle and I even remember how many girls I asked to the senior prom.  Twelve.  And I remember how many turned me down.  Thirteen.  One girl just came right up to me in the cafeteria and said, ĎDonít even think of asking me to the prom!í"  Larry thinks about this and then comments in a hurt tone, "A. . . a little unnecessary, donít you think?"  "Well, she might have had a good reason," Balki suggests, "Were you eating at the time?"  "I was merely using that story to illustrate the fact that I remember every detail of my life," Larry explains.  "Well, thatís good, Cousin," Balki counters, "Do you remember that youíre having dinner with Jennifer and her mother tonight?"  "Yes, I remember that Iím having dinner with Jennifer and her . . . " Larry begins in a mocking tone, then he looks startled and jumps up, pulling Balki up with him and crying, "Oh my Lord!  I have to have dinner with Jenniferís mother!  W . . . well, Balki . . . she hated a . . . a heart surgeon!  What am I gonna do?  My life is over!"  Larry starts to hyperventilate.  "Cousin, youíre hysterical," Balki points out, "Do you remember how I bring you out of this?"  "No!" Larry gasps.  Balki raises his hand and Larry immediately insists, "Iím fine," becoming instantly calm.

Later that night at the restaurant, Caulfieldís, Larry and Balki enter the foyer.  "All right . . . name," Balki quizzes him.  "Larry Appleton," Larry answers.  "Place of birth?" Balki asks.  "Madison, Wisconsin," Larry answers.  "Address?"  "I know where we live," Larry assures him.  "Youíre bluffing," Balki says, and he grabs Larry and pulls him aside.  "Balki, please, I am fine," Larry insists, "I have had my memory for four solid hours now.  So, just . . . just, please.  You didnít have to drive me here."  Balki pulls out a pen flashlight and shines it in Larryís eye, saying, "Let me just check and see if your pupils are annihilated."  Balki then shines the flashlight in Larryís mouth and says, "Open wide.  Nice and wide."  Larry opens his mouth wide.  "Say ĎAhh!í" Balki instructs, "Give me a nice big ĎAhh!í"  "Aaahhhh!" Larry sings as he holds his mouth open.  "Now you need to depress the back of your tongue," Balki says, and he sticks his finger in Larryís mouth, causing him to gag.  "Balki, please!" Larry scolds, "Now, l . . . look . . . donít tell Jennifer anything about my temporary memory loss.  She . . . sheíd only worry.  So just please, donít tell her anything."

"All right, all right, I wonít tell her anything," Balki promises, "Just let me go see if theyíre here."  "All right," Larry sighs. Balki shines the flashlight in Larryís eyes again until Larry shoes him away.  Balki hurriedly takes a look into the restaurant and then returns to report, "Theyíre here."  "Who are you?" Larry asks.  "Oh God!" Balki cries.  "Who am I?" Larry asks.  "Oh God!  Iíve got to get you out of here!"  Balki starts to pull Larry to the front door but Jennifer enters the foyer.  "Larry, what are you doing out here?" Jennifer cries, pulling Larry back, "Motherís waiting to meet you."  "Well!" Larry says, taken with Jennifer, "If sheís anything like you I would love to meet her."  "Larry, whatís going on here?" Jennifer asks.  "Uh, Jennifer," Balki says, taking Jenniferís arm and pulling her away from Larry, "I hate to be the wearer of bad news but Cousin Larry had an accident today.  He fall down the stairs, he bonk his head and . . . and then he lose his memory and then it come back but every time he needs it it goes away again."  Jennifer turns back to Larry with concern, asking, "Larry, are you all right?"  "Well, Iím fine," Larry smiles, "Now what díya say the two of us get outta here and get to know each other."  "Larry, we do know each other," Jennifer informs him, "Weíre engaged."

"Youíre gonna marry me?" Larry asks with genuine surprise.  "Yes," Jennifer answers, then she turns to Balki.  "Balki, if mother sees Larry in this condition sheíll never approve of me marrying him."  "Youíre gonna marry me?" Larry asks again.  "Maybe," Jennifer answers, not so certain this time, then she asks Balki, "What am I gonna tell mother?"  "Well, you just tell her that Cousin Larry had an accident," Balki suggests, "He fall down the stairs, he bonk his head, he lose his memory and now he donít know who he is from a hole in the ground.  The truth always works."  "Not this time," Jennifer sighs, "I used the amnesia excuse for one of my old boyfriends."  "Well, wait a minute," Larry steps in, "We need your motherís approval?"  "Yes," Jennifer answers.  "Well, we can make this work," Larry says, "I have . . . a plan!"  Jennifer and Balki shrug in surrender.  "Well, this could work!" Larry insists, "Iíll . . . Iíll just make small talk.  And . . . and . . . and if your mother wants to know something ahout me, uh, you and Bulki can tell her . . . . "  "Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me," Balki interrupts, "Balki . . . my name is Balki."  "Whatever," Larry dismisses him, "Listen, the point is we can make this work.  Itís worth a shot!  Come on!"  Larry grabs Jennifer and Balki and pulls them into the restaurant.

"All right, now, remember Blakely . . . " Larry begins once they get inside the restaurant.  "Balki," Balki corrects.  "When we . . . yeah, whatever . . . " Larry dismisses Balkiís correction, "If I get stuck for a fact you just jump right in and . . . and give me the answer.  But . . . but donít make it obvious.  You know, try to lead me to the right answer.  You think you can handle that?"  "Iím the one with the fully-functioning brain," Balki points out.  Larry looks at Jennifer with wide eyes and Jennifer just shakes her head and leads them to the table.  "Guys, this is my mother, Catherine Lyons," Jennifer introduces an elegant older woman who is sitting at the table.  "Mother, this is Larry."  Mrs. Lyons holds out her hand for Larry to shake and smiles, "Hello."  "Iím delighted to meet you," Larry assures her.  "Thank you," Mrs. Lyons replies.  "And this is Balki, Larryís cousin," Jennifer introduces.  "Hello," Mrs. Lyons says, holding out her hand.  Balki walks over to her and gives her a hug instead.  "Isnít that nice," Mrs. Lyons comments to Jennifer when Balki steps away, "He brought his cousin with him."  "We go everywhere together," Balki explains, "Weíre insufferable."

Larry, Balki and Jennifer take their seats at the table.  "Jennifer has, uh, told me so much about you, Mrs. uh . . .  Mrs. uh . . . " Larry falters immediately, "Mrs. uh . . . "  Larry motions to Balki to give him a clue.  "King of the jungle," Balki prompts, "King of the jungle."  "Mrs. Tarzan," Larry finishes.  "No," Balki sighs, "Uh, Lyons . . . Mrs. Lyons."  "Mrs. Lyons," Larry corrects.  "Cousin Larry would, uh, forget his own name if I hadnít sewn it into his underwear," Balki says, trying to help.  A waiter stops by the table and sets down a small tray of olives, baby corn and gherkins.  "Balkiís exaggerating, Mother," Jennifer assures her.  "Of course heís exaggerating," Larry says, "I have an excellent memory."  After a moment, Larry holds out his hand to Mrs. Lyons and says, "Hello, my name is Cousin Larry Appleton."  "Larry, stop joking," Jennifer urges with a smile, "Mother will think youíre not serious about marrying me."  "Serious?" Larry asks, "Well, of course Iím serious.  Who wouldnít want to marry a woman as lovely as Jessica?"  "Jennifer," Balki corrects quickly.  "Jennifer," Larry corrects immediately, "My dream is to make her Mrs. Cousin Larry Appleton."  "Why donít we order?" Jennifer suggests.  "Good idea," Larry agrees, and he snaps his fingers and calls, "Waiter?  Could we have some menus?"  The waiter replies, "Yes, sir," and goes to get the menus.  "I hear the food here is very good," Larry offers.

"Tell me, Larry, do you enjoy for the paper?" Mrs. Lyons asks.  "And what paper would that be?" Larry asks.  The waiter returns and hands Larry four menus.  Balki helps by saying, "Uh, Cousin Larry loves working at the Chicago . . . "  "Stockyards," Larry finishes.  Jenniferís mother smiles politely.  "You know very well that you work at the Chicago Chronicle," Balki reminds Larry.  "How many years have you been there?" Mrs. Lyons asks.  "Oh, uh . . . uh . . . uh . . . uh . . . "  Larry motions to Balki for help.  Balki picks up the tray and holds it out to Mrs. Lyons, asking, "Uh . . . would you care for an olive?"  "No, thanks," Mrs. Lyons replies.  "Sweet gherkin?" Balki asks.  "Not really."  "Try the baby corn," Balki insists, "Take three ears . . . three ears . . . take three ears . . . "  Mrs. Lyons looks very uncomfortable.  Larry finally gets it and says, "Uh, three years!  Three years.  Iíve worked at the Chronicle for three years.  Uh, waiter!" Larry snaps again and the waiter returns.  "Could we have some menus?"  "Theyíre right here, sir," the waiter points out.

Larry is startled to see the menus in his hand and says, "Oh!  Well, that was fast.  They know me here."  Larry hands a menu to Mrs. Lyons and then offers one to Balki, asking, "Menu?"  "Is he always like this?" Mrs. Lyons asks as she passes the menu to Jennifer.  "Mrs. Lyons, I know youíre concerned that . . . "  "Jennifer," Balki fills in without missing a beat.  " . . . marries happily.  I just want you to know that I intend to devote the rest of my life to making . . . "  "Jennifer."  " . . . happy."  "Thatís very reassuring," Mrs. Lyons smiles as she pats Larry on the hand, "Now why donít we all try and relax and have a wonderful dinner, hmm?"  "Well, I think thatís a great idea," Larry agrees as everyone opens their menus.  A moment later, Larry holds his hand out to Mrs. Lyons again and says, "Hello, my name is Cousin Larry Appleton."  He then snaps his fingers and calls, "Uh, waiter?  Could we get some menus?"  He notices the menu in his hand and says with surprise, "Oh!" and laughs.  Finally he looks at Balki and extends a hand, asking, "Have we met?"

Back at the apartment later that night, Larry and Balki are sitting on the couch.  " . . . and . . . Iíve . . . Iíve worked at the Chronicle for three years," Larry finishes.  "Oh Cousin, it looks like youíve got everything back," Balki smiles.  "Yeah," Larry sighs, "everything except what happened from when I fell down the stairs at the Chronicle to when Jenniferís mother stormed out of the restaurant."  There is a knock at the door and Larry goes to answer it.  Jennifer enters with her mother.  "Jennifer!  Mrs. Lyons!" Larry says with surprise.  "Larry, I explained everything to mother and she understands," Jennifer says.  "Y . . . you do?" Larry asks hopefully.  "Well, uh . . . uh, sort of," Mrs. Lyons admits, "Jennifer told me about your temporary amnesia and that seemed to explain most of your bizarre behavior.  I mean, you seem pleasant enough, you have a decent job and . . . thereís a certain desperation in your eyes that tells me you will never leave my daughter.  Welcome to the family."

"Thanks . . . Mom," Larry smiles.  "Call me Mrs. Lyons," Mrs. Lyons smiles seriously.  "Good news!" Balki says, "Uh, after Jennifer marries Cousin Larry then . . . then you will be my aunt-in-law five times removed.  My livestock will be your livestock!"  Balki hugs her again.  "Oh my!" Mrs. Lyons gasps uncomfortably.  "Iím so glad everything worked out," Jennifer smiles, "Well, we have to get mother to the airport.  Bye, Larry."  Jennifer steps forward and kisses Larry and then she and her mother walk to the door.  "Jennifer, are you sure about this marriage?" Mrs. Lyons asks.  "Iím sure," Jennifer insists.  "Uh, the foreign boy wonít be living with you, will he?" Mrs. Lyons asks, and she steps through the door.  Jennifer laughs and looks back at Larry and Balki, then her expression falls as she thinks about this.  She looks out the door with an uncertain expression, then walks out and closes the door behind her.  Larry turns to Balki and looks at him for a moment, then holds out his hand and asks, "Have we met?"

Continue on to the next episode . . .