Strangers Episode Guide
128 - Citizenship, Part Two
First Air Date: November 15, 1991
Filming Date: September 20, 1991
Nielsen Rating: 13.1 HH
Description: Conclusion. After Larry arrives on Mypos hoping to
persuade Mama Bartokomous to allow Balki to return home, he quickly settles in
to the relaxed, stress-free Myposian lifestyle. (Also, this description
was included in a sidebar: Larry finds Paradise on Mypos in the conclusion of a
laugh-filled Perfect Strangers two-parter. Balki followed when Mama
Bartokomous (Bronson Pinchot, in a dual role) returned to Mypos in a fury over
her son's decision to become a U.S. citizen. Tonight, Larry arrives to
bring Balki back.)
Produced by: Alan Plotkin
Created by: Dale McRaven
Written by: Barry OíBrien & Cheryl
Directed by: Judy Pioli
Bronson Pinchot: Balki Bartokomous / Mama
Mark Linn-Baker: Larry Appleton
Rebeca Arthur: Mary Anne Spencer
Melanie Wilson: Jennifer Appleton
Justin Pinchot: Balki Bartokomous / Mama
Bartokomous (over the shoulder shots)
Dimitriís photo can
be seen on the fireplace mantel at the end of this episode.
"Youíre barking up a dead
"Cousin, you can read me like a book
"But you know, Cousin, this is the
dirt is always browner syndrome."
"Well, that doesnít get the hair
out of the burgundy, does it?"
"When she gets an idea in her head
trying to get that idea out of her head is like trying to teach an old frog new
Donít be ridiculous:
Said once in this
Other catchphrases used in this episode:
Oddly enough there are no other catchphrases in this episode!
Other running jokes used in this episode:
Larry does a spit take
There is a reference to Larryís Maalox
The Dance of Joy
Balki throws himself onto the couch
Notable Moment: Larry visits Mypos
Balki becomes a U.S. citizen
Songs: "She Works Hard for the
Money" - sung by Mama as she arrives home from her seminar and chili
- The episode was filmed on September 20,
1991 in front of a regular studio audience with Bronson as Balki and Justin
standing in for Mama without the extensive face make-up. The scenes between Mama
and Larry were filmed earlier and shown to the studio audience on the monitors.
You can read more about the filming of this episode in our On the Scene . . .
- On November 7, 1991, Entertainment ran a behind-the-scenes report about the
extensive makeup transformation Bronson had to undergo to become Mama. You
can now watch this report on our YouTube
- The episode begins with a montage of
scenes to establish what happened in the previous episode.
- When Balki mentions he is going to
appear on a local talk show called Livestock of the Rich and Famous it
is, of course, a spoof on the popular series Lifestyles of the Rich and
Famous hosted by Robin Leach, whom Bronson has imitated several
- There are pictures of Larry and Balki
hanging on the walls of Mamaís hut which are actually publicity stills for the
- Mama tells Balki to go play bang bong
poki noki waka yahoo, which as youíll recall in the season five episode Hello,
Ball is a very strange Myposian version of golf.
Bloopers and Inconsistencies:
- Balki seems strangely underdressed when
they return from his swearing in ceremony. One would think he would have chosen
to wear one of his nice suits, although perhaps he wanted to wear something less
Myposian and more American for the occasion.
- Notice in the publicity shot at the top of this
page that Larry's feet are not purple!!
The episode begins with stock footage of a
commercial plane taking off. We then see the plane flying through the sky with
the sun behind it in the clouds. Next we see an ariel shot of some Greek ruins.
Then we see a small plane flying through the sky, and later it makes a very
rough landing in a wooded area. Next we see a rugged-style Greek boat with men
rowing it. And finally a small rowboat makes its way through some very rough
seas as a man bails frantically to stay afloat. At last we see an aerial
establishing shot of an island with the caption "Mypos." The camera
pans up a steep cliffside to show a series of mud huts high above the shore.
the village, a woman with a girl and boy beside her lead a flock of sheep
through an archway. In the village square, another group of sheep led by an
older man run past Balki, who is standing beside a hot dog cart.
While everyone else in the square is
wearing traditional Myposian clothing, Balki is wear jeans and a Chicago Cubs
t-shirt. Signs on the cart read "Baakia," "Hot Doggie" and
"Amerikaniko Avoevtiki." Larry enters the village square, carrying his
jacket and suitcase and looking travel-worn. A man approaches him and offers him
some pig snout on a stick. Larry politely declines. As Larry passes
has his back to him, he stops and looks down at his shoe, stopping to shake off
whatever he has just stepped in. Larry continues to walk by Balki, looking
around. "Hot doggies! Get them while theyíre hot!" Balki calls out,
"Hot doggies!" Larry sees Balki and walks over to stand next to him.
"Hello, Balki," Larry smiles. "Hi," Balki smiles, then he
starts to call again, "Hot . . . . " He stops and looks back at Larry
in disbelief as Larry sets down his suitcase. "Cousin Larry! Cousin Larry!
What are you doing here? I canít believe itís you! I . . . I must be
Balki starts to pinch Larry with his tongs
as Larry cries, "Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Youíre not dreaming!
me!" Larry takes the tongs from Balki and pinches Balkiís nose with them,
causing Balki to cry, "AH! It is you! Oh, Cousin!"
Larry happily and gasps, "Cousin, I . . . I . . . I mean, itís . . . itís
unbelievable! I . . . what are you doing here?" "Balki, I came to try
one more time to talk Mama into letting you come back to America," Larry
explains. "Oh, Cousin," Balki sighs as he shakes his head, "Youíre
barking up a dead horse." "Balki, just let me talk to her," Larry
says. "Well, Cousin, thatís a big no-can-do," Balki says, "Sheís
on the other side of the island." "Well, letís go get her,"
Larry suggests. "Well, Cousin, we canít," Balki continues, "Her
womanís group is having a consciousness-raising seminar and chili cook-off.
These things can be really intense. Sheíll be back in a week . . . more in
touch with herself and reeking of onions." "No problem, Iíll
wait," Larry states, "I took two weeks vacation." "Cousin," Balki smiles, then he reaches to pull a stool and a small
bench out from under his cart, "Well, Cousin . . . Cousin, eh . . . pull up
a stool . . . pull up a stool and take a load off."
They sit down and Balki hands Larry a hot
dog as a man ringing a bell walks through the square. Everyone in the square
promptly stops what theyíre doing and they pull out blankets and pillows and
lay down to sleep. "Whatís goiní on?" Larry asks. "Nap
time," Balki explains. "Well, for the whole island?" Larry asks.
"Well, yeah," Balki answers, "Except for me. Iím so excited!
. . . I havenít been able to sleep since you got here." Larry sets the
hot dog down and asks, "So, Balki, how are things goiní for ya
here?" "Great! Really great!" Balki answers emphatically,
"Yeah, um . . . uh . . . they . . . they had a big welcome home parade for
me and Iíve been invited to appear on a local talk show, ĎLivestock of the
Rich and Famous.í" "I . . . I wouldíve thought you would have been
a little homesick," Larry notes. Balki shrugs. "You know, because of
all you left behind," Larry continues, "Uh, your job . . . your
friends . . . Mary Anne . . . the coin-operated horse outside the Shop Ďn
"I do miss Blue Thunder," Balki
admits, then he sighs, "Cousin, you can read me like a book on tape. I am
homesick. I . . . I . . . things are not the same for me here. You know, thereís
no urban sprawl, no lines at the movies, no . . . no unsightly graffiti. I miss
America." "Well, we miss you, too," Larry assures him, "And
so thatís why, no matter what it takes, Iím gonna take you back."
"But Cousin, you know, I donít think youíre going to be able to
convince Mama into letting me go," Balki says worriedly, "Once she
gets her mind set on something, you know, sheís . . . sheís very
pig-headed." "Well, you let me worry about Mama," Larry insists.
"Well okay, Cousin," Balki smiles, then he gets up and says,
"Listen, until she comes back youíll be staying with me at Mamaís
place. Um . . . I think youíre gonna like it. Itís got central air and
detached chicken coop." Balki puts down a "no" symbol sign over
his cart and he and Larry leave the square.
We next see the establishing shot of the
hillside covered with mud huts and zoom in on one spot as a caption reads,
"Five Days Later." Balki is inside the hut, carrying a bucket of
water. He pulls a cloth away off something and we see it is a Mr. Coffee
machine. Balki fills the Mr. Coffee with water from the bucket then turns it on.
Balki then walks over to a decorated box with holes in it set above a nook with
a bowl in it beneath. Balki pulls on a tasseled cord and we hear the sound of a
chicken squawking as an egg rolls down a chute and into the bowl. Balki leans
over and says to the box, "Marge, Cousin Larry might want an omelette,
too." Balki pulls on the cord twice more and the chicken cackles again
before two more eggs roll down the chute and into the bowl. As Balki carries the
bowl to the table in the middle of the room to crack them, Larry comes in the
front door, pausing to shoo away what sounds like a bunch of chickens who are
trying to come in. Larry is dressed in Myposian clothing, while Balki is wearing
a Blackhawks t-shirt.
"Cousin, where have you been?"
Balki asks, picking up the bowl with the eggs and joining Larry on the bench in
front of the table. "I got up before dawn this morning," Larry
explains, "sat on the hill overlooking the village . . . you know what I
saw?" "The village?" Balki asks as he beats the eggs.
yeah that," Larry confirms, "But I . . . I also saw something truly
remarkable. I saw Mypiots on their way to work. They were happy . . . smiling .
. . saying ĎHelloí to each other. Well, th . . . they seemed to actually
enjoy just being alive." Balki nods and continues to beat the eggs.
"It was a totally stress-free environment," Larry sighs, "There
was no rat race." "Well, of course not. Donít be ridiculous,"
Balki scoffs, "The rat races are only on Sunday. Weíve got the, uh . . .
schedule stuck to the egg dispenser." "Balki, here . . . look at
this," Larry says as he holds up some kind of produce, "I picked it
myself." "Well, isnít that something?" Balki asks nicely.
"You canít do that in Chicago," Larry laughs, "Life here is
good." He takes a bite of the produce and promptly spits it out, making a
face. "Whatís wrong with this apple?" Larry asks. "Itís a
sour turnip," Balki explains, "Only horses eat those."
"And a perfectly wonderful sour
turnip it is," Larry smiles. "Toss it in here, weíll make an
omelette," Balki suggests, and Larry drops the turnip into the bowl. Larry
gets up and walks over to the Mr. Coffee machine, picking up a bowl and pouring
the entire contents of the carafe into the bowl. "You know, Balki, Iím
starting to feel at home here," Larry explains, "Yeah, and I . . . and
I think the villagers like me, too. All morning theyíve been calling out my
name wherever I go. Larry, Larry! Larry, Larry!" "Cousin, I hate to
burst your bubble, but Ďlarri larrií is a Myposian phrase," Balki
explains, "It means ĎSheep crossing, watch where you step.í"
"Well, thatís right neighborly of them," Larry smiles, "You
know, Balki, watching these happy, stress-free, smiling villagers, well, it made
me realize that, well . . . I wanna be one of Ďem." Larry pours a whole
container of sugar and a whole container of cream into his bowl of coffee and
swirls it as he crosses back to the bench to sit down.
Balki, Iíve made a
decision," Larry states, "I am going to stay on Mypos." "Well, Cousin, youíre welcome to stay as long as you like," Balki
offers, then adds as Larry takes a big swig of coffee, "By the way, youíre
drinking from the goatís water bowl." Larry does a spit take.
no, Balki, you . . . you donít understand," Larry says as he sets the
bowl down on the ground, "See . . . see . . . I belong on Mypos.
want to live here forever. Iím gonna call Mr. Wainwright, quit my job, tell
him what I really think of him . . . " "Now, Cousin, thatís going a
little far," Balki points out. "Then Iím gonna call Jennifer, tell
her to sell everything we own and get over here," Larry continues. "Speed bump, slow down," Balki warns.
"Iím gonna give away my
Maalox, have all my sport coats made into vests," Larry enthuses. "Now
Cousin, that is just . . . " Balki begins to argue, then he thinks about it
and says, "Actually the vest idea, thereís . . . thereís something to
"But you know, Cousin, this is the
dirt is always browner syndrome," Balki explains, "I went through the
same thing myself. Remember when we went to Six Flags for the first time and I
wanted to live on the log ride? I came back in a week." "No, no,
this is the real thing," Larry insists. "Now Cousin, come on,"
Balki argues, "Youíre not serious." "Look, Iíll . . . Iíll
show you how serious I am," Larry says as he pulls his plane ticket from
his vest, "See this? My return ticket to Chicago?" Larry tears it up
and throws it in the air. "Cousin, you are going to be sorry you did that
in about a week," Balki warns as he picks up the pieces from the floor,
"However, for the present, I think I can stick this back together for
you." Balki carries the ticket pieces to the table and starts to dip an
edge of one piece into the omelette mixture. "Balki, do what you
want," Larry says as he gets up and walks over to Balki, "But I am
here to stay." The scene fades to black.
Act two begins with an establishing shot
of the mud huts and the caption "Several Days Later." Larry is sitting
in the middle of the hut with his feet in a bucket. Balki appears in the doorway
carrying a pouch, and pauses to shoo away the unseen chickens again. "Did
you get it?" Larry asks. "Yeah, Niko says this would take the stains
right out," Balki explains. "Oh," Larry sighs with relief as he
pulls his feet out of the bucket to reveal they are purple as Balki drops some
granules from the pouch into the bucket for him. "He also said youíre
fired," Balki adds as he grabs a spoon and starts to stir the contents of
the bucket. "Fired?" Larry cries, "Niko says I was fired?
. . . I was one of the best grape crushers he had!" "He said you drank
too much of the wine," Balki relates. Larry look shocked. "Cousin, is
that true?" Balki asks. "No, I didnít drink any of the wine!"
Larry insists, "I fell in the vat. I was drowning!" "Well, that
doesnít get the hair out of the burgundy, does it?" Balki asks, then he
gets some vegetables from the kitchen and brings them over to cut them.
Larry puts his feet back in the bucket and
sighs, "Oh, this is great. Niko says Iím not good enough to step on
grapes. I . . . I rub my hands raw trying to be a butter churner but Dario said
my butter isnít spreadable. I get thrown out of my . . . my sheepherding class
because a wolf ate my training flock. Whoíd have thought thereíd actually be
a wolf in sheepís clothing?" "Cousin, maybe nine blisters, two
purple feet and fourteen dead sheep are a sign that you really belong in
Chicago," Balki suggests. Larry pulls one of his purple feet out of the
bucket to rub it with a towel and sighs, "Well . . . Balki, maybe youíre
right. I mean, who am I kidding?" Larry tries to lift his other foot out of
the bucket but itís stuck. He tries to push the bucket off with no luck.
"Iím going back to Chicago," Larry capitulates. "You . . . you
belong in Chicago," Balki points out. "Well, you know something?"
Larry asks, "So do you!" "I would love to go back to Chicago but
this is a conversation you have to have with Mama," Balki insists,
"When you say it to me . . . you know, it just really bums me out."
Balki gets up and walks away. Larry stands
up and walks toward Balki, his foot still stuck in the bucket. "Well,
thereís got to be something that . . . that we could say to change her
mind." "Cousin, you donít know Mama," Balki sighs, "When
she gets an idea in her head trying to get that idea out of her head is like
trying to teach an old frog new tricks. Now Mama has decided that she wants me
here and that is that. I . . . I donít know, Cousin, how I can explain this to
you?" They have walked over to the other side of the hut where a hammock is
hanging. "Have a seat," Balki suggests, and they sit down together.
Larry still has the bucket on his foot. "Balki, I came five thousand miles
to try to talk Mama into letting you come back to America and thatís what Iím
gonna do," Larry states. "Well," Balki sighs, then they hear Mama
approaching, singing loudly, "She works hard for the money, so hard for the
money . . . " "Looks like youíre gonna get your chance," Balki
says, and he and Larry struggle to get up out of the hammock. "She works
hard for the money so you better treat her right," Mama sings as she comes
in the door, pausing to chase away the chickens. Larry remains standing by the
hammock as Balki runs to the other side of the door to greet his Mama.
Mama sees Balki and hugs him, sighing,
"Balki! Balki, babiki!" "Mama!" Balki hugs her back.
kisses him then steps back to look at him proudly, smiling, "Thatís very
nice. Very nice." She walks to the kitchen to set down the kettle sheís
carrying, not noticing Larry on the other side of the hut. "Uh, welcome
home, Mama," Balki offers. "Thank you," Mama answers.
guess what?" Balki asks. "What?" Mama asks with her back still to
him. "Cousin Larry has come to visit!" Balki says happily.
yeah right!" Mama scoffs. "Hello, Mama," Larry says. Mama stops
what sheís doing and remains still, then finally she turns to see Larry.
"Mama, we have to talk," Larry says. "Balki, go ludiki bang bong
poki noki waka yahoo," Mama instructs. "Mama, Mama, eh . . . I want to
stayiki," Balki argues. "Go ludiki bang bong poki noki waka
yahoo," Mama orders more sternly. "Why no stayiki?" Balki cries.
"Because Iím the Mama and I said so!" Mama screams in a screeching
voice. Balki and Larry both look shocked. Balki turns to Larry and says,
"Cousin, if she gets you in a head lock just yell. Iíll be right
outside." Balki hurries out the door.
Mama approaches Larry with her arms open,
sighing, "Cousin Larry." "Hello, Mama," Larry smiles.
"Hello, hello, yes," Mama says, "Yes. Yes, I uh . . . we eat.
eat." "No, I donít . . . " Larry tries to protest. "Oh
yes," Mama says, and she picks up a huge bench and carries it around to the
other side of the table. "No, no, I . . . Mama, I really donít . . .
" Larry continues to argue as he follows her, "No Iím not . . . Iím
not hungry. No . . . no, Mama . . . nothing . . . Mama, we . . . "
sets a large pot with a wooden spoon in it on the bench then sits down. "Mama, we have to talk," Larry says.
"Cousin Larry, sit down . .
. " Mama grabs Larry and pulls him onto her lap. " . . . and take a
load off." "Oh no no, Mama," Larry cries as Mama takes a spoonful
of food and shoves in into his mouth. "Very nice," Mama smiles,
"Very nice. Mmmmm. This a new dish and I want your take on it."
keeps protesting as Mama shoves another spoonful of food into his mouth. Larry
starts to choke and Mama cries, "Oh! Oh no! No, no, Cousin Larry!"
Mama jumps up and grabs a bota bag from the kitchen and hurries to Larry with
Mama holds the bota bag in front of Larry
and squirts liquid from it into Larryís mouth. Larry stops choking.
"Better?" Mama asks. Larry moans in the affirmative.
juice," Mama explains the contents of the bota bag. Larry gags and leans
forward, coughing. "Cousin Larry," Mama says as she gets another
spoonful, "Cousin Larry, yes . . . " "Oh no, Mama, no no, thatís
enough," Larry argues, pushing the spoon away, "Thatís enough, Mama.
No, Mama. Mama, weíll . . . weíll eat later. All right?"
"Yes," Mama sighs. Larry approaches Mama, saying, "Mama?"
"Yes," Mama sighs. "Mama?" "Yes?"
"We have to
talk," Larry says gently, just as he steps forward with his foot thatís
still in the bucket, stepping with it onto Mamaís foot. Mama lets out a long,
loud "Yiyiyiyiyiyi!" kind of scream as Larry jumps back. Mama hops
around on one foot and dances around, trying to shake off the pain. "Sorry!" Larry cries. Mama tries to step on the bucket to help Larry
remove it, then reaches down to grab it and pull. "Here take this . . . all
right, all right," Larry says, and the motion three as Mama pulls. Larryís
foot comes out of the bucket and Mama flies around and lands with her stomach
across the hammock. "Oh no," Mama gasps.
"All right, okay, Mama!" Larry
calls as he gets up and runs over to help her, "Okay here . . . let me . .
. let me help you up. Let me help you up, Mama. Let me help you."
straddles Mama to try to lift her but Mama cries out in protest. "Here,
hang on! Hang on, Mama!" Larry says as he runs around to the other side to
help lift her, "Hang on! All right, here we go. Here we go."
yes," Mama says as Larry lifts her, then she comments, "What happened
to your feet? Theyíre funny color!" Mama manages to get to her feet and
Larry says, "There. Are you okay? Are you okay, Mama? Are you all right
now?" Larry steps over the hammock and manages to step right onto Mamaís
other foot. "Oh, yiyiyiyiyiyi!" Mama screams again and she starts to
hop around, "Oh! Ooh! Ow ow ow ow ow." Larry leads her to the bench
and suggests, "Sit down, Mama. Here we go." They both sit down and
Mama sighs, "Oh! Ooh!" She gives Larry a long look and finally asks,
"Why have you come to Mypos?" She guesses, "You come to take
Balki back to America."
"Well, yes, Mama," Larry admits.
"Yes," Mama sighs. "I . . . I was hoping to talk you into letting
him go back," Larry continues, "Convincikaki." "Yes,"
Mama nods, "Go back . . . go back." "Balkiís whole life is in
America," Larry explains. "Yes," Mama sighs. "His job is
there." "Job, yes . . . " "His . . . his friends who miss
him." "Friends, yes." "His girlfriend who . . . who loves
him." "Skinny Minny?" Mama asks. "Skinny Minny," Larry
confirms. "Yes," mama sighs, then she says, "Feed her, Cousin
Larry." "I will, Mama," Larry promises. "Please," Mama
emphasizes. "I will," Larry says. "Such a tiny little
thing," Mama indicates. "Mama, Balki loves you very much," Larry
continues. "Yes, yes," Mama acknowledges, "Yes."
if you really want Balki to be happy . . . " "Yes." " . . .
youíre gonna have to let him go back to America." Mama looks at Larry
sincerely and says, "You have come very far and you have broken my foot.
You . . . you must love Balki very much." "Yes, I do, Mama,"
Larry confirms. "You do," Mama nods. "And . . . and so do all of
his friends in America," Larry adds. "Balki many, many friends in
America?" Mama asks. "Yes . . . yes, Mama," Larry nods.
is very much love in America?" "Yes, Mama."
Mama stands and Larry stands with her.
After thinking a moment, Mama says, "Balki go . . . go back to America.
then . . . then Balki happy and . . . and . . . and Mama happy."
I will be happy," Larry smiles. "And then . . . " Mama says
as she leads Larry to an open space, "Then . . . then weíll all will be
so happy we do the Dance of Joy." Larry and Mama perform the Dance of Joy
together with Larry ending up in Mamaís arms. Balki runs back into the hut and
sees Larry in Mamaís arms. "Either Iím going back to America or . . .
or thereís a mouse in the hut." Mama sets Larry down and approaches
saying, "Balki . . . Balki, go home. Go back to America." "Mama!" Balki exclaims happily, and he gives her a hug.
yes, very, very nice," Mama smiles. "Thank you, Mama," Balki
offers. "No problem," Mama smiles. "Mama, you can come to America
to live with us if you want," Balki suggests. Larry starts motioning wildly
behind Mamaís back, "No!" "Well . . . I saw that," Mama
says as she turns on Larry, "No, Mama belongs in Mypos, you know."
Larry nods in emphatic agreement and Mama turns on him again, making him freeze.
Balki and Mama hug again as Mama sighs, "Babiki, yes . . . very, very
Some time later in America, Larry,
Jennifer and Mary Anne enter the house and stand by the open door. They are all
dressed very nicely. "Heíll be in in a minute," Larry says, "Heís
never run up the sidewalk as an American citizen before." Balki appears in
the doorway and says, "This is the first time . . . "
Balki rings the
doorbell repeatedly. " . . . Iíve rung the doorbell as an American
citizen." "You looked so cute when you were being sworn in," Mary
Anne smiles. "Weíre very proud of you, Balki," Larry adds.
"Congratulations, Balki, weíre glad youíre here to stay," Jennifer
smiles. Balki flings himself onto the couch, exclaiming, "This is the first
time Iíve flung myself on the couch as an American citizen!" Balki jumps
up and runs to the others, saying, "And you know . . . you know what is the
most amazing thing?" "Whatís that?" Larry asks. "The exact
moment that I was sworn in and I became an American citizen, I completely lost
my accent!" Balki runs excitedly into the kitchen. Larry look at the girls
and says, "Weíll tell him in the morning." Balki runs back out of
the kitchen and slides into a group hug with the others, exclaiming, "And
this is the first time that Iíve hugged all three of my very best friends in
the whole world all at the same time as an American citizen!" With that,
the episode ends.
on to the next episode . . .