Perfect Strangers Episode Guide

EPISODE 73 - Good Skates

First Air Date: September 22, 1989
Nielsen Rating: 14.6 HH

TV Guide Description: The Wrath of the Gabuggis -- the Myposian fib furies -- haunts Larry on the fifth-season opener when he lies about his roller-skating prowess in order to compete in a charity skate-a-thon and to impress Jennifer.

Co-Producer: James OíKeefe
Created by: Dale McRaven
Written by: John B. Collins
Directed by: Joel Zwick

Cast:
Bronson Pinchot: Balki Bartokomous
Mark Linn-Baker: Larry Appleton
Rebeca Arthur: Mary Anne
Melanie Wilson: Jennifer Lyons
Sam Anderson: Mr. Sam Gorpley

Guest Cast:
Noon Orsatti: Grant Larkin
Terry Burns: The Announcer

Dimitri Appearances: Dimitri can be seen sitting on the bookcase wearing roller skates.

Balki-isms:
"I love the Big Brothers!  First time I ever saw them on Saturday Night Live I said to myself ĎThose guys are good!í"
"I love marathons!  Will you get to meet Jerry Lewis?"
"I hate to dig up a can of worms."
"And until you tell the truth, Eva, Magda and Zsa Zsa will continue to be a thorn in your sideburns."
"Boy, when you come clean you leave a ring around the tub!"

Donít be ridiculous: Not said in this episode.

Other catchphrases used in this episode:
"Oh my Lord!"
"That is correct."

Other running jokes used in this episode:
Balki looks into Larryís mouth as Larry explains how to pronounce a specific word
Balki laughs at his own joke
Larry falls down the stairs then calls up "Iím fine!"
Larry calls Wisconsin the "something" State to suit his needs, in this case the "Barrel-Jumping State"
When Jennifer is about to forgive Larry she makes reference to something he did as a "thing," in this instance, "the barrel-jumping thing"

Interesting facts:
-
This season ABC moved the show to 9 p.m. on Friday nights.
goodskatesgrab08.jpg (42189 bytes)- This was the first episode to be broadcast in stereo.
- JoMarie Payton France was no longer on Perfect Strangers, because starting this season she starred in her own spin-off series, Family Matters.  The pilot episode, titled The Mama That Came to Dinner, debuted on this night right before PS.  Behind the scenes, Family Matters employed PS alumni Paula A. Roth as producer and co-executive producers William Bickley and Michael Warren.  Other familiar names from PS gracing the production credits of the show were Robert Blair, goodskatesgrab30.jpg (49268 bytes) Ronny Hallin, James OíKeefe, Harriette Regan, Deni King, Kelly Sandefur and Robert Bramwell.  R.  Robert Rosenbaum acted as executive in charge of production as well.  During the show's opening credits Harriette and family are seen riding bicycles across the same bridge which Balki and Larry boated under in their own opening.
- What many fans donít know is Balki and Larry originally were to appear in the pilot episode. Unfortunately, their brief scene with Harriette at the beginning of the show ended up on the cutting room floor. As a result, to this day many people donít even realize Family Matters was a spin-off from
Perfect Strangers!
goodskatesgrab29.jpg (46778 bytes)- Also beginning this season was ABCís Friday night hosted lineup called TGIF (which stood for Thank Goodness itís Funny).  Full House began the night at 8:00 p.m., followed by Family Matters, Perfect Strangers and finally Just the Ten of Us (a spin-off from Growing Pains), although on this season premiere night the final show would be a special preview of Free Spirit.  Making the TGIF lineup so memorable were the filmed segments shown between the programs, each week featuring actors from one of the four shows, introducing the programs as they aired.  This tied the evening of family entertainment together nicely and remains a fond memory for those who watched ABC prime time television in the late 80's and early 90's.
- This season, Sam Andersonís name was included in the opening credits whenever he appeared.  Rebeca and Melanieís goodskatesgrab31.jpg (42468 bytes) names were switched in order so that Rebecaís name appeared first during this season.  And for the first time, the charactersí names are listed after the actors in the opening credits (with the exception of Bronson and Mark.)
- Interestingly enough, no one in the cast knew how to roller skate before making this episode!
- On the first draft of the script there is a banner which states it is the 75th episode.  It also notes it was the third episode for the season.  The order of the episodes changed when they aired, so the 75th episode would end up being The Newsletter instead.
- During the first scene, Balki and Larry are finishing dinner.  Sitting on the table is a serving tray with a blue cover on it.  Ever wondered what was under that cover?  Read the script variations below to find out!
- The charitable organization, Big Brothers, is the focus of this episode.  Established in 1904 in America, Big Brother Big Sisters pairs mentors with children who are in need of an older role model and friend.  For more information, you can visit their international website by clicking here.
goodskatesgrab04.jpg (37810 bytes)- The establishing shot of Skateland doesnít even hide the fact itís in Northridge, which is located in the San Fernando Valley area of Los Angeles county (the "Chicago Big Brothers Skate-a-thon" on the sign out front was supposed to divert our attention).  The rinkís website even states that it was seen on Perfect Strangers, as well as many other television and feature films!  You can visit them here.
- The Gabuggis were based on the famous Hungarian actresses, the Gabor sisters, also named Eva, Magda and Zsa Zsa.  Eva Gabor was best known as the glamorous wife of Eddie Albertís character in the cult 60's comedy series Green Acres.  Zsa Zsa (the only surviving sister) was making headlines in the summer of 1989 when she slapped a Beverly Hills police officer after being stopped for a traffic violation.  This incident was undoubtedly still fresh in peopleís minds, which is likely why this reference to them was made in this particular episode.
- Noon Orsatti, who plays the adept skater Grant Larkin, is a noted stuntman who continues to perform and coordinate stunts in movies to this day.  His father, Ernie Orsatti, and nephew, Frank Orsatti, are also stuntmen, and in keeping with the family tradition Noonís sons are also stuntmen!  He is known in the fan world for his work on Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.
- Another Happy Days reference is made in this episode when the announcer says that Cunningham Hardware will offer goodskatesgrab06.jpg (8088 bytes) five hundred dollars in the name of the person who jumps the most barrels.  Cunningham Hardware is the store Howard Cunningham owned in Milwaukee, Wisconsin in that series.
- Two of the regular extras from the previous season show up at the roller rink to watch the Skate-a-thon.
- Around this time, repeats of Perfect Strangers began running weekday mornings on ABC.

Bloopers and Inconsistencies:
-
When Grant comes by he explains to Jennifer he just stopped by to drop off his pledge sheets.  But how did Grant know he could find Jennifer and Mary Anne in the apartment below theirs?
goodskatesgrab05.gif (147085 bytes)- When the phone rings on Larryís desk and he sets down his file folder he places it on the corner of Balkiís work table.  There donít seem to be any other files on the table, at least not to the left or center.  But when Balki skates into the scene, the folder on the edge is gone and there are a bunch of folders laying on the table where there were none before.
- In the close ups when Jennifer, Mary Anne and Grant are cheering Larry on before he jumps the barrels, there is no one to Jenniferís immediate left (her right) but in the long shots there is a woman standing right next to her.


Synopsis:
Larry and Balki are sitting at the dining table, finishing dinner.  Larry wipes his hands on a napkin and says, "Balki, that was a wonderful Myposian dinner."  "Oh," Balki says, waving away the compliment.  "Donít spoil it for me by telling me what it was," Larry requests.  "Okay, Cousin," Balki agrees, "The pig bladder au jus will be my little secret."  Larry reacts as if he is about to gag.  There is a knock at the front door.  "Iíll get it," Larry says, getting up from the table and walking over to open the door.  Balki follows him.  Jennifer and Mary Anne enter, Jennifer holding some papers.  "Hi," Larry smiles.  "Hi, guys," Jennifer begins, "Um, Mary Anne and I are raising money for the Big Brothers."  Balki gasps, saying, "I love the Big Brothers!  First time I ever saw them on Saturday Night Live I said to myself ĎThose guys are good!í"  "No, no, Balki," Larry says, "Thatís the Blues Brothers.  Blues Brothers.  The Big Brothers is a charitable organization.  Men who belong to it act as big brothers to boys who need fathers."  "Oh!" Balki says, understanding.

Balki takes Mary Anneís hand and they walk to the couch.  Jennifer and Larry follow.  "Weíre roller skating in a ten hour marathon to help raise money for them," Mary Anne explains.  "A marathon?" Balki asks as they all sit, "I love marathons!  Will you get to meet Jerry Lewis?"  "No, Balki . . . marathon," Larry explains, "Marathon, not a telethon."  "Oh!" Balki nods.  "Anyway, uh, we thought you guys might like to sponsor us," Jennifer explains, "You know, pledge money for every hour we skate."  "Well, Balki and I will be happy to sponsor you," Larry smiles.  "Great!" Jennifer says happily.  There is another knock at the door.  "Iíll get it," Larry says, getting up and walking to the front door.  "How much do you want?" Balki asks Mary Anne.  "How much you got?" Mary Anne asks.

Larry opens the door and a young, good-looking man enters, carrying the same kind of papers Jennifer has.  "Hi!" the man says to Larry.  "Hi," Larry replies.  "Hi, Jennifer, Mary Anne," the man says to the girls, who get up to meet him.  "Hi, Grant!" Jennifer says, giving Grant a hug in greeting.  Larry is immediately suspicious.  "Uh, Larry, Balki," Jennifer continues, leading him in front of the couch where Mary Anne and Balki are standing, "This is Grant Larkin."  "How you do, you?" Balki asks, shaking Grantís hand.  "Grantís a flight attendant on our crew," Jennifer explains.  "Oh, I just came by to drop off my pledge sheets for the skate-a-thon," Grant says, handing Jennifer his papers.  "Thanks, Grant," Jennifer says, "Grant is a terrific fund raiser.  Last year this wonderful guy raised a thousand dollars for Big Brothers."  "Youíre kidding me?" Balki gasps, "For those little tiny kids?  Why thatís wonderful!"  Jennifer and Mary Anne also gush over Grant.  "It was nothing," Grant assures them.  "Oh, youíre being modest!" Jennifer scolds, "It was more than anyone else raised!"  "Donít you ever do that again!" Balki also scolds as they all protest.

Larry has been standing to one side watching this with barely disguised jealousy.  "Oh!" he suddenly exclaims, "Oh!  A skate-a-thon!  A roller skating marathon!  You know . . . instead of pledging money I should be skating myself."  "Do you roller skate?" Jennifer asks.  "Do I roller skate?" Larry asks, "Well, the kids used to call me ĎWheelsí Appleton!"  "Kids can be so cruel," Balki sighs sadly.  "No.  No, no," Larry says, "They called me that because I was a terrific skater."  "Larry, I never knew that," Jennifer states, then hands him a paper, saying, "Here.  Hereís a pledge sheet."  "Thatís great!" Grant says, "We need all the help we can get.  Well, I gotta go.  Iíll see you guys on Saturday."  "See you," Balki says.  "Great," Jennifer smiles.  "Bye," Mary Anne adds.  "Itís nice meeting you, Wheels," Grant says to Larry as he heads for the door.  "Bye, bye," Larry smiles.  "Balki, why donít you skate, too?" Mary Anne suggests.  "Oh, I would love to," Balki answers, "but . . . but I donít know how."  "Well, maybe ĎWheelsí can teach you," Mary Anne suggests.  They all look to Larry expectantly.  "Would you, ĎWheels?í" Balki asks hopefully.  "Why not?" Larry shrugs.

The next scene takes place the next night.  Balki and Larry are sitting on the couch, tying up the laces on the roller skates they are wearing.  "Iím so excited," Balki says, "Learning how to skate at the feet of ĎWheelsí Appleton.  Tell me, ĎWheelsí . . . how long will it take me to learn how to skate?"  "I donít know," Larry answers.  "How long did it take you to learn how to skate?" Balki asks.  "I donít know," Larry admits, "I never had a pair of skates on before in my life."  Balki nods, then realizes what Larry has said.  "I . . . I hate to dig up a can of worms," Balki begins, "but donít that mean you lied to Jennifer about being able to skate?"  "Well, what was I supposed to do?" Larry asks, "Let Grant raise all that money for charity and then be a big hero for Jennifer?"  "Well, Cousin, you canít keep her by lying!" Balki points out, "Lord knows youíve tried!  And every time you do, you wind up with a pocketful of babasticki.  Itís time to talk about reality.  Itís time to talk about the hard facts.  Itís time to talk about the Wrath of the Gabuggis."

"The Gabuggis?" Larry asks, as if he didnít hear correctly.  "The Gabuggis," Balki confirms, "The Myposian Fib Furies . . . Eva, Magda and Zsa Zsa.  They are the daughters of Vertash, God of Truth, and his lovely wife Succotash.  Each of the Gabuggis has one penetrating eye right in the middle of her nose bridge that sees everything and they punish those who dishonor truth by telling lies."  "Fascinating," Larry hums, "Balki, Iím sure Iíll be safe from the wrath of these Gabuggis because I am doing a good thing.  I am helping children.  And even Eva, Magda and Zsa Zsa wonít mind if I tell a teeny tiny itsy bitty little white lie . . . pop!"  Larry flicks his fingers as if tossing something away, ". . . to help children."  "But Cousin, if . . . "  "Children," Larry interrupts, "Helping little children."  "Cousin, you know, I know thereís an error in logic here somewhere but . . . I canít put my finger on it."  "Well, while youíre trying to figure out where to put your finger, why donít we learn how to skate?" Larry suggests.

"Well, how we do that?" Balki asks.  "Well, I figure the quickest way to learn is to keep these skates on and never take them off," Larry explains, "Come on . . . give it a try.  Itíll be easy."  They both slowly stand up on their skates.  "There, see?  What did I tell you?" Larry asks.  "Well, weíre not moving yet," Balki points out, "If the sport were roller standing weíd get a ten!"  Balki laughs at his own joke.  "All right," Larry says, "Now we want to start moving.  Okay?"  "Okay," Balki agrees.  "Here we go," Larry prompts.  Larry and Balki turn to the right and start walking with tiny steps on the carpet, shimmying along in a strange fashion.  "Huh?" Larry asks, "See?"  "Yes," Balki smiles.  "See?"  "Yes," Balki agrees, then he steps off the carpet onto the hardwood floor and his feet start to roll out from under him.  He struggles to maintain control as Larry also slips somewhat on the wood floor, but also manages not to fall.

Once again they starts to shimmy walk on the skates by the front door.  "See?  Huh?" Larry asks, "We are doing great!"  "Well, well . . . technically weíre not roller skating," Balki points out, "Weíre still just roller walking."  "All we need is a little speed," Larry says, grabbing Balki by the pants and then pushing him across the floor toward the kitchen.  Balki reaches the counter and grabs on to the pillar for dear life, giving Larry a dirty look.  "There?  Ya see!" Larry says happily, roller walking toward Balki as Balki starts roller walking toward him.  "Learning to roller skate is just like learning to ride a bicycle," Larry continues, "All we need is speed!"  Balki turns Larry around so that his back is facing him.  "Now, you give me a push!" Larry encourages.  Balki shoves Larry hard toward the front door.  Just then Mary Anne opens the front door and walks in.  Larry rolls out the front door and there is the sound of him crashing down the stairs.  Balki roller walks over to Mary Anne and they both look out the door as we hear Larryís voice finally call, "Iím fine!  Iím fine!"  "Larryís good!" Mary Anne notes.

Sometime later at the Chicago Chronicle, Larry is standing by Balkiís table looking at a file folder.  The phone on his desk rings.  Larry sets the folder down and starts moving to the phone gingerly.  We can see he is still wearing the roller skates.  He struggles to roller walk the short distance to his phone, but loses control halfway and starts spinning around wildly.  He manages to stop spinning and regains his balance, then tries to move forward but instead rolls backwards into another mail table.  Larry pushes himself forward and rolls toward the phone, then swings off toward the stairs, grabbing onto the railings as his legs move out from under him in opposite directions.  Larry somehow manages to pull himself to his feet again, then turns around and tries to hold onto the stairs as he reaches for the phone.  He stretches out further and further toward the phone, then falls behind his desk with a thud.  Larry pops up at his desk and lifts the phone receiver, asking, "Hello?"  After a moment he says, "Hello?  Hello?"  Whoever it was has hung up.  Larry sets down the receiver with frustration.

As Larry struggles to get to his feet, Balki skates in from the loading dock, moving elegantly around his worktable on one foot.  He then rolls by Larry on one leg, handing him his mail.  He skates backwards around Larryís desk and lays gently down across the two low file cabinets in front.  "Thereís your mail, by the way," Balki says, then sighs, "Oh Cousin!  Skating is so simple!"  Balki gets to his feet again and wheels toward the parking garage.  "And . . . so grand!"  Balki skates around the basement effortlessly, saying, "So free.  So fluid.  So swan-like.  So light.  So airy."  He stops at Cousin Larry and adds, "So cholesterol free."  "I told you it was easy to learn," Larry forces a smile.  Balki continues to skate around the basement as Larry struggles clumsily just to get back to Balkiís table and get his folder.  Balki glides back around to his table as Larry makes his way back to his own desk.

Mr. Gorpley enters from his office and eyes Balki and Larry in confusion.  "Youíre both on roller skates," he observes, "Did I miss a memo?"  "No, Mr. Gorpley," Balki says, "Weíre practicing.  Weíre raising money for charity."  "Charity begins at home," Gorpley quips, "Practice there."  "Itís for a good cause, Gorpley," Larry says, almost falling again, "Weíre in a skate-a-thon.  Weíre raising money for the Big Brothers."  "You?" Gorpley asks, then breaks out laughing, saying, "I hope they donít need much!"  "Well, for your information," Larry continues, approaching Gorpley and slipping on his skates with every step, "I have collected the most pledges!"  "Of course you did.  Nobody thinks youíll finish!" Gorpley laughs, then heads to his office.  "Oh yeah?" Larry asks, "Well, I intend to skate the full ten hours . . . " Larry insists, chasing Gorpley all the way to his office as Gorpley continues to laugh and mock him, closing the door to his office behind him.  " . . . and to raise more money than anyone else!" Larry finishes, stumbling over to where Balki is standing.

Balki helps Larry to get steady on his skates, then hooks his arm around Larryís.  "Now Cousin, thatís not going to happen," Balki begins, as he skates Larry around the basement, "Why?  Because youíre not lying to help children.  Youíre lying to impress Jennifer.  And until you tell the truth, Eva, Magda and Zsa Zsa will continue to be a thorn in your sideburns."  "Balki, I am going to impress Jennifer," Larry insists, "And if the Gabuggis think they can stop me, let them try!"  Balki looks around nervously and skates away from Larry, who stands in the middle of the basement in defiance.  Balki ducks behind Larryís desk.  "Come on, ladies!" Larry says loudly, barely staying on his feet, "Take your best shot!"  Larry waits, but nothing happens.  "I thought not," he says smugly.  Suddenly he loses his footing and crashes to the floor.  Balki skates over to him and lays down beside him.  "Cousin, youíre lucky!  That was Magda.  Sheís the nicest one," Balki explains.  The scene fades to black.

Act two begins at the roller rink called Skate Land where the skate-a-thon will take place.  The sign out front reads "Chicago Big Brothers Skate-a-thon."  Inside the rink, people are skating.  There is a big countdown clock set up to count down the ten hour time period.  Larry, Balki, Jennifer and Mary Anne enter, all wearing sports clothing and are carrying their skates.  "So," Larry says, "this is Skateland.  Not a professional rink but I guess itíll have to do.  The important thing is raising money for Big Brothers."  "Larry, how did you manage to get twelve hundred dollars in pledges?" Jennifer asks, "Even Grant couldnít do that."  "I guess some of us have it and some of us donít," Larry says in a smarmy voice.  "And some of us canít get rid of it," Balki comments in the same smarmy way.  "Jennifer, letís go put on our skates," Mary Anne suggests.  Jennifer and Mary Anne walk away.  Larry and Balki walk to the rink entrance as Grant skates by backwards, then spins to a stop.  "Hi, Grant," Larry says.  "Hi, ĎWheels,í" Grant smiles, "Iíll catch you later."  He skates off backwards.

Larry continues to smile in a forced manner.  "Cousin," Balki warns, "This is your last chance to tell Jennifer the truth.  The air is thick with Gabuggis."  "Oh, another Gabuggi update," Larry says facetiously, "You know, Balki, Iím beginning to understand why on Mypos a sheep can run for public office."  The scene dissolves into the beginning of the skate-a-thon, with the announcer saying, "The skate-a-thon is underway!  Good luck, everybody!"  A large number of people are skating, including Larry, Jennifer and Mary Anne.  Mary Anne is carrying her camera around her neck.  Larry is struggling along as he skates.  Balki follows up behind them, skating backwards.  We see the clock move from hour 4 to hour 3 as the announcer states, "Three hours to go!  Hang in there, skaters!"  There are still a number of people skating, and Larry is really struggling to continue.  Balki comes up behind him and puts Larryís arm around his shoulder and helps him to go on.  As they skate past Jennifer and Mary Anne, who have already dropped out, Grant zips past them doing a move where heís in a squatting position with one leg extended in front of him.

We see the clock again as it moves from 1 hour to 0 hour and the announcer calls, "Weíre in the home stretch!"  At this point only Larry, Balki and Grant are still skating.  Or rather Balki and Grant are skating . . . Balki is actually pulling Larry backwards by his pants.  Grant is skating circles around them, doing jumps and tricks.  "Twenty seconds to go!" the announcer calls.  "You can do it, Larry!" Jennifer calls.  "Go, Balki!" Mary Anne shouts.  "Go, Larry!" Jennifer says, trying to prompt Mary Anne to say the same.  "Go, Balki!" Mary Anne calls again.  "Why canít you ever cheer for my boyfriend?" Jennifer asks.  "Oh, okay," Mary Anne agrees, then shouts, "Go, Larry!"  As they round the last turn again, a tired Balki is pushing Larry from behind, who is skating in a seated position.  "Are we moving?" Larry asks wearily, "Are we moving?"  Grant skates by the exhausted pair effortlessly.  The announcer begins to count down, "Three, two, one!"  A buzzer sounds and Larry sits down on the floor of the rink as Balki skates over him and the crowd cheers.  "I did it!" Larry exclaims, "I did it!  I raised more money than Grant!"

Mary Anne runs to Balki to hug him and Jennifer runs to Larry, stooping down.  "Larry, you were wonderful!" she says as she hands him his jacket.  "Balki, did you hear that?" Larry asks, "Jennifer thinks Iím wonderful."  "You were wonderful, too, Balki!" Mary Anne assures him.  "And my heart is pure," Balki adds, hugging her.  "Iím so proud of you, Larry," Jennifer says sweetly, "Do you know you raised the most money?"  "Did I?" Larry asks, struggling to his feet and pulling on his jacket, "Well, it doesnít matter who raised the most money.  I never thought of this as a competition.  I just welcome the opportunity to unselfishly devote my time and skating ability to those in need."  There is a drum roll and the announcer steps out into the rink.  "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please?" he asks as men bring four barrels out onto the rink, "Cunningham Hardware has offered to donate five hundred dollars to the Big Brothers in the name of the person who can jump the most barrels."  "Well, their money is safe," Larry says, "After ten hours nobodyís got the energy to do that."  "I do," Grant says.  "You do?" Larry asks.   "Sure, Iíll give it a shot," Grant says, and skates away from them.

"This is exciting!" Mary Anne says, "Jennifer, letís go over there where I can get a better picture."  The girls hurry to the other side of the rink.  "No!  This canít be happening!" Larry complains, "The skate-a-thon is over.  I won!  And theyíre taking a picture of Grant?"  Grant takes off from the opposite side of the rink as Jennifer and Mary Anne call out "Come on, Grant!  You can do it!"  Grant circles the rink and then speeds toward the barrels, clearing them with ease.  Everyone applauds enthusiastically.  Grant leaves the rink and goes over to Jennifer and Mary Anne, where Jennifer gives him a hug.  Balki takes Larryís arm and leads him to the rink exit, saying, "Face it, Cousin.  All your lying was for nothing.  But itís still not too late to save yourself from the Wrath of the Gabuggis by telling Jennifer the truth."  "Maybe youíre right," Larry sighs.  Jennifer runs up to them.  "Larry!" she cries.  "Jennifer . . . " Larry begins.  "Did you see Grant fly over those barrels?  It was the most beautiful thing I ever saw!"  "Add another barrel!" Larry calls out.

"Larry, you jump barrels?" Jennifer asks with surprise.  "Iím from Wisconsin, the Barrel-Jumping State!" Larry exclaims.  "Iím gonna get Mary Anneís camera!" Jennifer says excitedly, and hurries off.  Larry heads back onto the rink but Balki grabs his jacket and cries, "Cousin, no!  No, no, no, no!  I canít let you do this!"  He heads Larry off.  "The Gabuggis, I have a feeling, have just been waiting to get you over a barrel!"  "Balki, I canít let Grant beat me!" Larry cries, "Now get out of my way!"  "No, Cousin!" Balki cries, "I have to save you!"  "Oh my Lord!" Larry suddenly cries.  "What?" Balki asks.  "Balki, you were right!  I see them!" Larry gasps.  "Who?" Balki asks.  "The Gabuggis!" Larry cries.  "Where?" Balki asks, looking up.  "Over there!" Larry says, directing Balkiís attention to the wall around the rink.  Larry then pushes Balki so that he ends up flying over the wall.  Jennifer and Mary Anne shout encouragement to Larry and they watch with Grant.  Balki slowly looks up over the wall as Larry skates around the rink with a determined look.  Everyone is cheering him on as he rounds the final turns and heads for the barrels.  Unfortunately, he barely leaves the ground as he plows into the five barrels, rolling over them all and landing in a heap on the ground on the other side, much to the amusement of the spectators.

Back at the apartment that night, Jennifer, Mary Anne and Balki enter, carrying Larry on their shoulders.  Larry is still wearing his skates.  They carry him to the back of the couch then drop him down onto the cushions.  Balki and Larry squat down behind the couch and look over the top as Jennifer bends down next to Larryís head on the armrest.  "Larry, Iím sure youíre a good skater, but you were crazy to try to jump that many barrels," she says.  "Jennifer, I have a confession to make," Larry says, "Until four days ago I never skated before in my life.  And Wisconsin is actually the Dairy State.  And Iím not five foot ten."  "Boy, when you come clean you leave a ring around the tub!" Balki comments.  "Why did you lie to me, Larry?" Jennifer asks.  "Well, I was just jealous of Grant," Larry confesses.  "Jealous of Grant?" Jennifer cries, "Grant is a happily married man!"  "Well, you never mentioned he was married," Larry complains.  "Well, I didnít think it was important!" Jennifer counters.  "I guess I made a fool out of myself, Jennifer," Larry smiles meekly.  "Well, you didnít . . . except for maybe the barrel-jumping thing," Jennifer thinks, "But . . . at least you raised a lot of money for the Big Brothers.  Thanks for that."  Jennifer gives Larry a kiss.

"Balki, I had a wonderful time," Mary Anne smiles, "Maybe tomorrow you can come up and we can play roller derby."  "Iím counting the moments, my little lamb shank," Balki says, and he gives her a shy kiss on the cheek.  "Well, bye Larry," Jennifer says as she and Mary Anne get up to leave, "Weíll see you guys tomorrow."  "Oh yeah," Mary Anne says, "and by then Iíll have the pictures developed and then we can relive the whole thing!"  They leave and Mary Anne closes the door behind her.  "Oh good," Larry sighs.  Balki, still sore from the skating, climbs onto the back of the couch.  "I never should have lied, Balki," Larry admits.  "That is correct," Balki agrees.  "You were right," Larry adds.  "That is correct," Balki also agrees.  "When I lie, something bad happens," Larry concludes.  "Well, the Gabuggis make sure of that," Balki notes. "Are they still here?" Larry asks worriedly.  "No, they slipped out the moment you told the truth," Balki explains, "Theyíre probably on their way back to Washington."  Larry reacts as the episode ends.


Script Variations:
There are some major differences between the first draft dated July 26, 1989 and the final episode:
The first scene begins with Balki at the dining room table doing homework and Larry taking a book from the bookcase, then crossing to the couch.  "Cousin, were you good in history?" Balki asks.  "My best subject," Larry brags.  "Could you explain what the New Deal was all about?" Balki asks.  "Sure," Larry answers, "You see . . . well, uh, the New Deal replaced the Old Deal after the Old Deal got too old."  "Don't know, huh?" Balki asks.  There's a knock at the door and Larry says, "I'll get it.  Might be important."  Larry opens the door and Jennifer and Mary Anne enter.  "Hi, guys," Jennifer begins, "Mary Anne and I have something to ask you."  "Whatever it is, the answer is yes," Larry assures them.  "That was easy," Mary Anne comments, "Bye, guys."  "Mary Anne, we haven't asked yet," Jennifer points out, "We're raising money for the Big Brothers."  "Jennifer, your big brothers need money?" Balki asks, "Was their allowance cut off by your big daddy?"  "Balki, the Big Brothers is a charitable organization," Larry explains, "Men who belong to it act as big brothers to boys who need fathers."  "Well, then why don't they call it Big Fathers?" Balki asks.  "Balki," Larry cuts him off.  "Well, I can get in front of that," Balki says instead.  "We're roller skating in a ten hour marathon to raise money for them," Mary Anne explains.  "A marathon?" Balki asks, "Will you get to meet Jerry Lewis?"  "Marathon," Larry says, "Not telethon.  A marathon is something that goes on for a long time.  Like these explanations."  Jennifer then asks if they would like to sponsor them and Larry agrees.
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There is another knock at the door and Larry opens the door to Grant.  "Hi," Grant says, "Are Jennifer and Mary Anne here yet?"  "Hi, Grant," Jennifer greets him, "Larry, Balki, this is Grant Larkin.  Grant's an attendant on our flight crew."  "On all your flights?" Larry asks worriedly.  "Every one," Grant answers, "I don't know how we'd get along without Jennifer."  "Isn't he sweet?" Jennifer asks, "Grants in the Skate-a-thon, too.  Last year this wonderful man raised a thousand dollars for Big Brothers."  "Well, for that much money you could probably get a couple of Big Brothers and a nephew to be named later," Balki notes.  "I hope I do as well this year," Grant says.  "You'll do great," Jennifer assures him, "You're the best."  Jennifer hugs Grant's arm.  "Oh, oh.  A Skate-a-thon," Larry says, "Roller skating marathon.  Where's my head?"  "On your shoulders, Cousin, where it usually is," Balki answers.  "What I mean is instead of standing here pledging money I should be skating myself," Larry says.  "Do you roller skate?" Jennifer asks.  "Do I roller skate?" Larry asks, then asks Balki, "Do I roller skate?"  "Does he roller skate?" Balki asks, "Does he roller skate?"  He thinks, then asks Larry, "Do you roller skate?"  Larry explains about 'Wheels' Appleton (Balki doesn't reply with the comment about kids being cruel in this version, though).  Jennifer gives Larry a pledge sheet and Mary Anne asks Balki why he doesn't skate, then when Balki says he doesn't know how suggests maybe 'Wheels' can teach him.  "No problem," Larry says, then to Jennifer, "I'll be great to pull on the old skates again.  And this year, Jennifer, don't be surprised is there's a new top fund raiser."  "That's great," Jennifer smiles, "It's all for charity.  See you Saturday at the Skate-a-thon."  "Nice meeting you, 'Wheels,'" Grant offers as he and the girls leave.  "Cousin, this is going to be fun," Balki says, "Skating in my first Skate-a-thon."  "Yes," Larry agrees, "We'd better go buy skates."  "I would have thought 'Wheels Appleton' would have his own," Balki notes.  "Why would I have my own?" Larry asks, "I've never had a pair of skates on in my life."  Larry exits and Balki follows, saying, "Cousin, maybe I misunderstood the concept of skating.  I thought skates were a requirement."
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The next scene starts later with Larry and Balki returning to the apartment with roller skates in boxes.  "Well, if we can get the publisher to sponsor us in the Skate-a-thon, I'm sure we can shame the rest of the department heads to do it," Larry states.  They put the boxes on the coffee table.  "Speaking of shame, Cousin 'Wheels,' I thought this might be a good time to talk about why you lied to Jennifer about being able to skate."  "What am I supposed to do?" Larry asks, "Let Grant raise all that money for charity and be a big hero for Jennifer?  Did you hear what Jennifer called Grant?  A 'wonderful man.'  She's never called me a 'wonderful man.'  Balki, if she starts to compare me to Grant, I'll come up short."  "But, Cousin, you are short," Balki points out, "What does height have to do with it?  The only reason you're doing this is to impress Jennifer.  And whenever you do that you get in trouble."  "Okay, so my motives aren't pure," Larry admits, "So what?  Skating can't be that hard.  Children do it.  And we're going to be raising money for charity.  That's a good thing."  Balki makes the comment about putting his finger on what's wrong and Larry says, "Well, while you're trying to figure out where to put your finger, let's lace up."  They sit on the couch and takes the skates out of the box.  "Cousin, maybe we should get a teacher," Balki suggests, "Perhaps Grant?"  "We don't need a teacher," Larry insists, "It has to be easy.  The skates don't even come with instructions.  Now we know, we learn by doing.  Therefore the quickest way to learn is to put the skates on and never take them off."  "Cousin, isn't that going to make it difficult to take a shower?" Balki asks.  "You take them off when you shower," Larry assures him.  "Well, how about when I -- "  "You take them off when you need to," Larry interrupts, "Come on."  They stand up and Larry notes how easy it is and Balki points out that if they were roller standing they'd get a ten.  Larry pushes Balki, who rolls away.  An angry Balki walks back and shoves Larry.  Larry almost loses his balance and grabs Balki, who gets off balance and they both struggle to keep their balance until finally they fall onto the couch.  "Good, we're making progress," Larry states.  "Cousin, we're still on the couch," Balki notes.  "We were standing for a moment," Larry says, "Look, I've seen people do this.  You push off with your back foot and glide.  Then push off with your other foot and glide.  Push and glide.  Got that?"  "Sure, it's the same motion we use on Mypos when we go sheep tobogganing," Balki responds.  Larry thinks a moment, then says, "Exactly.  Okay, let's try it."  They get up and try to skate.  "Push and glide," Larry prompts.  "Push and glide," Balki repeats.  They skate around the couch, gaining more confidence.  "Cousin, we're skating," Balki exclaims, but then Larry starts to skate faster and Balki says, "Cousin, don't go too fast."  "There's nothing to this," Larry insists, "When you want to stop you just aim for a wall."  As Larry comes around the couch, he starts to lose his balance.  He aims for the front door to stop himself, but Mary Anne opens the door and Larry skates out and tumbles down the stairs.  "Wow," Mary Anne says, "Larry is a good skater.  Skating down stairs.  He makes it look so easy."  "I'm alright," Larry calls from off screen.
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The scene at the office starts with Larry taking a file out of the filing cabinet as Balki comes in skating really well.  "Cousin, I delivered all the mail in fifteen minutes," Balki says, "Roller skating is wonderful."  "I told you it was easy to learn," Larry says.  The phone on his desk starts to ring and Larry struggles to reach it.  "Let me help you, Cousin," Balki offers.  Balki pushes Larry, who shoots across the room waving his arms frantically and then crashes into his desk.  "Thank you," Larry says.  "You're welcome," Balki smiles.  Larry answers the phone and says, "You're willing to sponsor me?  Great."  Larry grabs a pencil and paper and writes down the information as he says, "Two dollars an hour.  That's terrific.  Thanks a lot."  Larry hangs up the phone and addresses Balki.  "Balki, I'm a cinch to raise the most money at the skate-a-thon.  This is wonderful.  I'm going to beat Grant and be Jennifer's hero."  "Yes, and we're going to raise a lot of money so those little boys will have Big Brothers," Balki agrees.  "And I'm going to beat Grant and be Jennifer's hero," Larry repeats.  Gorpley enters and the scene with him is much the same, except when Balki explain, "If Cousin Larry skates all ten hours, he's going to be the biggest money grabber there."  "And I'm going to beat Grant and be Jennifer's hero," Larry says to himself.  "Fat chance," Gorpley scoffs as he takes out his wallet and opens it, "I've got a hundred bucks in here that says you don't make it to the finish, Appleton."  "You're on!" Larry agrees, "It's a deal."  "Cousin, you were wrong," Balki says, "Mr. Gorpley's wallet isn't glued shut."  "This is going to be the easiest hundred bucks I've ever made," Gorpley smirks, exiting.  "Yeah, well, I'll see you at the skate-a-thon and you better bring that hundred bucks!" Larry says, trying to go after him.  Larry starts to fall but Balki catches him.  "Cousin, maybe you should give your sponsors to Jennifer.  That way you won't have to skate a dangerous lie."  "Not a chance, Balki," Larry argues, "I have twenty-four hours to practice.  By tomorrow I really will be 'Wheels' Appleton.  Now help me stand up." Balki helps Larry stand up and this is the end of act one.
At the roller skating rink, Balki, Larry, Jennifer and Mary Anne enter, carrying their skates.  "Cousin, look at this turnout," Balki says, "The Big Brothers are really going to make some big bucks today."  The bit about "some of us have it and some of us don't" follows.  Lydia enters wearing a cocktail dress and skates.  She's with a swarthy looking man in a tuxedo.  "Raoul, you wait over there," Lydia says to her date.  "Nobody told me this was formal," Mary Anne says.  "Lydia, aren't you a little over dressed?" Larry asks.  "Not for what Raoul has in mind," Lydia smiles, "You see, he has this little fantasy . . .  Well, what difference does it make?  He's pledging five hundred dollars."  Jennifer suggests to Mary Anne they put on their skates.  As they walk away, Mary Anne asks, "So is it formal or not?"  "I love skating," Lydia tells Balki and Larry, "When I fall down men pick me up."  She skates away.  Grant skates by them and says hi to "Wheels" before skating away.  "Cousin, it's still not too late to tell Jennifer the truth," Balki points out.  "Balki, stop worrying," Larry says, "Everything's going great.  I'm going to raise more money than Grant."  "But, Cousin, you won't raise more money than Grant is you don't finish the Skate-a-thon."  "If Grant can skate for ten house, so can I," Larry insists, "What has he got that I haven't got?"  Grant skates past them again and does a fancy trick.  "What was the question?" Balki asks.
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There is a montage of scenes which are explained like this:
    A series of vignettes, showing the Skate-a-thon in progress:
       1. The clock shows it's the first hour of the Skate-a-thon.
       2. A crowd of people skate by.  Jennifer and Mary Anne skate by having fun.  Larry and Balki are skating.  Balki is having fun.  Larry is grimly concentrating on his skating.  Lydia is skating and waving.
       3. The clock shows there are five hours left.
       4. The crowd of skaters has thinned out.  We see people giving up.  Lydia drops out of the Skate-a-thon.  Larry and Balki are still skating.  Balki is still fresh.  Larry is growing weary, stumbling occasionally.
       5. Gorpley is watching.  He sees the shape Larry is in and starts laughing.
       6. The clock shows only one hour left in the Skate-a-thon.
       7. Balki is helping a tired Larry to skate on.  As a fresh-as-a-daisy Grant skates by Larry -- backward.
       8. The clock shows there are only twenty seconds left.

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There are a handful of skaters left, including Larry, Balki and Grant.  Gorpley is checking his watch as Jennifer and Mary Anne cheer them on.  The announcer is counting down the final seconds.  "Twenty seconds," the announcer says, "Nineteen . . . "  "Come on, Cousin," Balki encourages, "Push and glide.  Push and glide.  Okay, pick one."  "Balki, I'm too bushed to push," Larry complains.  Grant skates past them.  "Hi, Grant," Balki offers.  "Push and glide," Larry says with determination, "Push and glide!"  On the sidelines, Jennifer calls, "You can do it, Larry!"  "Come on, Larry," Lydia adds.  "You can make it!" Mary Anne shouts.  "Give up, Appleton," Gorpley chimes in.  They all give Gorpley a dirty look.  "Hey, I have a hundred bucks riding on this," Gorpley explains.  Larry and Balki continue to struggle.  "Am I moving?" Larry asks.  Grant skates by them again.  "We may be going backward," Balki notes.  "Seven, six . . . " the announcer calls.  "Pick up sticks," Larry says in a daze.  "Five, four . . . "  "Just a little more," Balki urges.  The announcer counts down the last three seconds and the buzzer sounds.  Jennifer and Mary Anne run into the rink to congratulate them.  Jennifer calls Larry wonderful, which Larry relishes.  "You were wonderful, too, Balki," Mary Anne says, "You skated all ten hours and for the last two you were carrying Larry."  "He ain't heavy.  He's my Cousin," Balki states.  "You lose, Gorpley," Larry reminds him, "Give me my hundred dollars."  "Hey, I don't carry that kind of money," Gorpley remarks, "Uh . . . I've got it in my car.  You wait here."  Gorpley exits in a hurry.  Lydia turns to Raoul and says, "Follow him.  If he doesn't have the money, rip out his stereo."  Raoul goes after Gorpley.  Lydia thinks a moment then decides, "I think I'd like to see this."  She hurries out after them.
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Jennifer points out that Larry raised four hundred-ninety nine dollars more then Grant.  Larry assures her it doesn't matter who won the most money.  There is a drum roll and the announcer calls everyone's attention.  "I guess this is where they thank me," Larry says smugly.  "It's time for the event you've all been waiting for," the announcer says.  "Yeah, they're going to thank me," Larry smiles.  The men start rolling out the barrels.  "Cousin, they're rolling out the barrel for you," Balki observes, "You're going to have a barrel of fun."  After the announcer explains the event and Grant says he'll do it, Jennifer confirms that Grant does it every year.  "That's how he raises the most money," Mary Anne adds.  "Wish me luck," Grant says, "I'm going to do it blindfolded this year."  Grant skates onto the floor.  "No, this can't be happening," Larry whines, "The Skate-a-thon's over.  I won."  "Cousin, you're not being a very good sport about this," Balki points out.  "Balki, Grant could make an extra five hundred dollars," Larry says, "He's going to beat me by one lousy dollar."  Grant successfully jumps over the barrels.  "Cousin, you shouldn't feel bad," Balki says, "You did a good thing.  You raised a lot of money for charity.  That's something to be proud of.  And, for once, you didn't go crazy."  Larry shouts for them to add another barrel.  "Perhaps I spoke too soon," Balki says worriedly.  Jennifer asks Larry if he thinks he can do it and Larry tells Jennifer that Wisconsin is the Barrel Jumping State.  "Cousin, you barely for through the Skate-a-thon," Balki points out, "I don't think they'll let me carry you over the barrels, too."  "Balki, I'm rested," Larry explains, "I'm ready.  There's nothing to this.  I just get up a little speed, head for the barrels and jump."  "You talk a good jump, Cousin," Balki accepts, "But I can't let you do it.  You might hurt yourself."  "Get out of my way, Balki," Larry snarls, "I'm not going to lose Jennifer to some barrel jumping bozo."  Larry goes to the floor and starts skating, but Balki grabs him by the belt so that Larry is skating in place.  "You're slowing me down," Larry complains.  "That's the point."  "Look, is that Vanna White?" Larry cries, pointing away.  Balki turns and lets go of Larry, who skates around the rink to get up speed.  He plows into the barrels.  Balki goes to him and says, "More bad news, Cousin.  That wasn't Vanna."
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In the final scene, Balki wheels Larry into the apartment as if he were pushing a hand dolly.  He pushes Larry to the couch and lowers him onto it as Jennifer and Mary Anne watch.  "Larry, you were crazy to try to jump that many barrels," Jennifer says.  "You were crazy to try to jump any barrels," Mary Anne adds.  "Cousin Larry is good at that," Balki notes, "Insanity on short notice."  After Larry admits he was jealous and Jennifer explains Grant was married and then when he complains she never mentioned it she says she didn't think it was important, Balki says, "Jennifer, you should know better."  Mary Anne only says goodnight to Balki, then as she and Jennifer leave she asks, "I don't understand.  If he never skated before, why did they call him 'Wheels?'"  "Balki, I can't believe I made such a fool of myself again," Larry moans.  "Believe it, Cousin.  In fact, one more time and you'll get permanent possession of the trophy."  "I shouldn't have lied," Larry sighs, "You're right.  It never works."  "Why can you only see that when you're in pain, Cousin?" Balki asks.  "I think pain gets my attention," Larry notes.  "Well, cheer up, Cousin.  You did raise money for a worthwhile cause and you should feel good about that."  "I guess I will when I can feel anything at all," Larry agrees, "I think I'll go to my room now."  "Let me help you, Cousin."  Balki helps Larry off the couch, tilts him and then starts to wheel him toward his room.  "Watch out for the couch," Larry directs, "Don't hit the end table.  A little to the left now.  That's it.  Now . . . "  As Larry continues to give Balki directions they fade out.

There are a still some differences in the shooting draft dated August 16, 1989:
In the first scene, after Larry explains that the word is marathon and not telethon, he says, "A marathon is something that foes on for a long time.  Whereas a telethon is something that goes on for a long time . . . but is different."  "Oh, why didn't you say so?" Balki asks.
- After Jennifer introduces Grant Larkin as a flight attendant on their crew, Mary Anne adds, "He's on every one of our flights."  The bit where Larry asks "Do I roller skate?" several times and Balki does as well is still in this script.
- At the end of the scene, after Larry says, "Why not?" to teaching Balki how to skate, Balki says, "Whoopee."  "Yep, it'll be great to pull on the old skates again," Larry says, "And this year, Jennifer, don't be surprised if there's a new top fund raiser."  "That would be nice, Larry," Jennifer smiles, "It would take some of the pressure off Grant."  "As long as you're here, why don't you stay for dessert?" Balki asks.  "That sounds great," Mary Anne answers.  They start for the kitchen.  "It's (MYPOSIAN)," Balki says.  "It sounds delicious," Jennifer says, "What is it?"  "Pig lips with creme fraiche," Balki answers.  Mary Anne, Jennifer and Larry do an about face.  "Ice cream?  My treat?" Larry asks.  "You don't like creme fraiche?" Balki asks.
- After Balki realizes Larry has lied and Larry asks what he was supposed to do, Larry says, "You heard what she called him."  "A flight attendant," Balki answers.  "A 'wonderful guy.'  Larry repeats the "coming up short" joke from the previous script and Balki points out he is short.  "I mean if I don't do something to show I'm better than Grant, I could lose Jennifer."  This is when Balki points out he can't keep Jennifer by lying and reminds him that every time he does he winds up with a pocketful of babasticki.  "No problem," Larry says, "I'll just wear something with no pockets."
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In the script, the father of the Gabuggis is spelled Vertas, but Balki pronounces is more like Vertash in the show.  He explains, "Each of the Gabuggis has one penetrating eye right in the middle of her nose bridge that sees everything and one ear along the side of her head that hears everything, and they look and they hark and they find and punish those who dishonor truth by telling lies."  The only other difference in the scene is at the end when Mary Anne comments, "Wow.  Larry is good," before Larry calls up "I'm fine."
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In the office scene, when Balki is extolling the virtues of skating he says it is "So effortless.  So liberating.  So energy efficient."  The rest of the scene is the same.
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At the roller rink, after Larry says, "Oh, another 'Gabuggi Update?' he adds, "The fact of the matter is that, in spite of the Gabuggis, I have learned to skate."  "That's the way the Gabuggis work," Balki warns, "They wait 'til you're at the peak of your lie and then they push you off into the abyss of your own humiliation."  This is when Larry says he understands why sheep can run for public office on Mypos.  Grant skates and says hi to "Wheels" and "Catch you later," then skates away.  "Cousin, at the risk of having you insult my country and its elected officials, I must warn you the Gabuggis are closing in."  "Look, if you'll keep quiet about the Gabuggis for the next ten hours, I promise I'll tell Jennifer I lied about being able to skate," Larry promises.  "Okay, Cousin," Balki says, "It's a deal.  Perhaps the white light of my honesty will distract them.  If that doesn't work, I'll have to show them a little more thigh."
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There is a montage of scenes which are explained like this:
    A series of vignettes, showing the Skate-a-thon in progress:
       1. The clock shows it's the first hour of the Skate-a-thon.
       2. A crowd of people skate by.  Jennifer and Mary Anne skate by having fun.  Larry and Balki are skating.  Balki is having fun.  Larry is skating pretty well but not having fun.
       3. Balki skates by holding a tray of hors d'oeuvres, passing them out.
       4. Grant skates by with Jennifer.  Larry tries to catch up but can't.
       5. The clock shows there are five hours left.
       6. Mary Anne takes a picture of Larry.  The flash blinds him.  He skates into the wall.
       7. The crowd of skaters has thinned out.  We see people giving up.  Larry is still skating, growing weary, stumbling occasionally.  Balki skates by reading a book.  The title is "Men of Sheep and the Women Who Love Them."
       8. The clock shows only one hour left in the Skate-a-thon.
       9. Larry is barely moving.  A fresh-as-a-daisy Grant skates by Larry -- backward.  Larry gathers up his strength.
       8. The clock shows there are only twenty seconds left.
- At the end of the skate-a-thon, when Jennifer and Mary Anne are calling out for Larry and Balki respectively, Jennifer asks, "Why can't you ever cheer for my boyfriend?"  "Because your boyfriend is dragging mine down," Mary Anne explains.  Larry asks, "Am I moving?" and Balki says, "I'm moving for two."  When they are done skating, the directions say Balki and Larry sit on the wall.  After Jennifer points out that Larry has raised the most money and Larry says he was happy just to raise the money, Balki says, "Cousin, don't you have a promise to keep?"  Quietly he prods, saying, "The truth?"  "Right, Balki.  Thanks for reminding me."  Larry turns to Jennifer.  "Jennifer, the truth is, I promise to do this every year."  Balki is shocked.
- Instead of saying "I'll give it a shot," Grant says, "Watch!"  After Larry complains that they're taking Grant's picture after everything Balki says, "Cousin, I hate to add insects to injury, but if there's one thing that really gets the Gabuggis ticked off, it's when you promise to tell the truth and tell another lie."  "Do me a favor," Larry says, "Sic the Gabuggis on Grant.  He must have lied sometime in his life."  The rest of the scene plays out the same, except for the very end when Balki skates to Larry on the floor and says, "Peek-Gabuggi, Cousin."
- Mary Anne's line "You were crazy to try to jump any barrels" is still in this version of the script.  After Jennifer says, "I didn't think it was important," Mary Anne says, "Well, it is to Grant."  "And to Cousin Larry," Balki adds.  After Balki says the Gabuggis are probably on their way back to Washington, Larry says, "Well, it's been a rich, full day.  I think I'll go to my room now."  "Let me help you, Cousin," Balki offers.  Balki then wheels Larry to his room like a hand dolly with Larry directing him, saying, "Now swing it on in."

Continue on to the next episode . . .