Perfect Strangers Episode Guide

EPISODE 88 - Nightmare Vacation

First Air Date: February 2, 1990
Filming Date: January 12, 1990
Nielsen Rating: 14.6 HH

TV Guide Description: Larry plans a getaway for the foursome to Club Paradise, a tropical resort whose serenity is shattered by a hurricane. 

Co-Producer: James OíKeefe
Created by: Dale McRaven
Written by: Barry OíBrien & Cheryl Alu
Directed by: Joel Zwick

Bronson Pinchot: Balki Bartokomous
Mark Linn-Baker: Larry Appleton
Rebeca Arthur: Mary Anne
Melanie Wilson: Jennifer Lyons

Guest Cast:
James Hampton: Mac MacIntyre

Dimitri Appearances: Dimitri can be seen at the start of the episode in Balkiís arms.

" . . . I think I can safely say that this time everythingís coming up noses."
"Well, if we all follow the golden rule I donít know why not."
"Cousin, um . . . call it intuition, call it common sense, call the wind Mariah . . . "

Donít be ridiculous: Said once in this episode.

Other catchphrases used in this episode:
"Well, Iíll be snookered."

Other running jokes used in this episode:
Larry plans a vacation which turns out to be a disaster
Balki grabs Larry by the nose
Balki's love of Wayne Newton is referenced

Interesting facts:
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It should be noted that Dimitriís nose is different in this episode.  Instead of a black button-style nose he has a simple stitched nose.  To read more about this strange change in Dimitri's nose during this season, check out this Dimitri's page.
- The footage of the plane landing on the island has been used in countless different series, including The Odd Couple in the episode Felix the Calypso Singer.
- Balki makes a reference to Gilligan's Island, saying the hotel they're staying in is nicer that the Howellís hut.  Thurston Howell the III and his wife Lovely were millionaires who had the most lavish of all the huts on the island, hence Balki's reference.
- Television fans will undoubtedly recognize character actor James Hampton, who has not only made guest appearances in numerous shows but has had regular roles in shows such as F-Troop, The Doris Day Show, Teen Wolf, 1st & Ten and Full House
Not only is James prolific in front of the camera but behind the camera as well, directing episodes for series such as Evening Shade, Grace Under Fire and Sister, Sister, as well as also writing for television.
- A very funny and obscure joke can be found in this episode when Mac off-handedly tells them that Papillion was shot on the island.  Papillion is a 1973 film starring Steve McQueen and Dustin Hoffman and follows the true story of prisoner Henri Charriere who was wrongly convicted of murder and sent to life in the hellish penal colony on French Guiana, South America, and his repeated attempts to escape.
- During the filming of this episode, Rebeca not only talked about having everything from the soundstage blown into her eyes but she actually suffered whiplash doing the stunts where they fall back against the mattress!  To hear her tell this story, check out her interview on A.M. Los Angeles on our YouTube Channel!

Bloopers and Inconsistencies:
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The Club Paradise sign is superimposed over the establishing shot of the hotel (you can see the image waver slightly over the shot) and actually the hotel they used was rather a nice looking place, not to mention busy since several people can be seen walking around outside, even though no other people were ever seen inside.  No mention of the neighboring buildings are made, either.
If you look closely, you can see the wires holding Balki up and the effect they used to blur them out at one point.

The episode begins in the apartment where Mary Anne and Jennifer are sitting on the couch while Balki is seated on the arm and holding Dimitri.  Larry is sitting on the arm of the chair addressing the other three.  "You are not going to believe the vacation I have planned for us," Larry says, "And itís well within our budget.  Wait here . . . Iíll get the brochure."  Larry stands up, assuring them, "You are going to love it!"  Larry runs into his bedroom.  Jennifer and Mary Anne turn to Balki as he gets down from the arm and sits next to them.  "Weíre not going," Jennifer states.  "Why not?" Balki asks.  "When Larry comes back youíre just going to have to tell him weíre not going," Jennifer insists.  "Where is it weíre not going?" Mary Anne asks.  "It doesnít matter," Jennifer tells her, "If Larry planned it, weíre not going."

"Now, ladies, listen to me," Balki urges, "I know that in the past Cousin Larryís trips have proved a little life-threatening but this time things are going to be different.  Now, I . . . I took a peek at the travel brochure and . . . just between you and me, I think I can safely say that this time everythingís coming up noses."  "Balki, I still havenít gotten my luggage back from our last trip," Jennifer points out.  "Oh, come on now," Balki says, "Come on . . . Cousin Larry wants more than anything for you to have a good time.  He . . . heís trying to make up for his past mistakes."  "Balki, we know his intentions are good . . . but thatís when heís the most dangerous," Jennifer says worriedly.  "Well, maybe we should give Larry another chance," Mary Anne suggests, "I mean, after all, he did pay all of our medical bills last time."  "Well, my . . . my tetanus shot is up to date," Jennifer sighs, "so . . . why not?"  "Great," Balki smiles, "Thank you."

Larry comes out of the bedroom and Balki goes back to sitting on the arm of the couch.  "Now everything is set," Larry says and he returns to sit on the arm of the chair, "We are going to Paradise."  "Well, if we all follow the golden rule I donít know why not," Balki says.  "No, we are going to Club Paradise," Larry explains as he opens the brochure, "Itís a small resort island tucked away in the warm waters of the Gulf of Mexico."  "Great, weíll go," Jennifer says.  "Now just hear me out!" Larry asks, "Because itís got sunshine, beaches . . . "  "Sounds wonderful," Mary Anne chimes in.  "Now I know Iíve messed up before, but just give it a chance," Larry begs, "Itís got great shopping . . . "  "Cousin," Balki tries to interrupt.  "Great food!"  "Cousin?"  "Entertainment!"  "Cousin!"  "What?"  "I . . . I think theyíre saying yes," Balki points out.  "They are?" Larry asks with surprise.  Jennifer and Mary Anne nod.  "Well, thatís great!" Larry says happily, then he tells Balki, "I told you thereíd be no problem."

We see an establishing shot of a small plane landing on the beach of a tropical island.  A shot of Club Paradise shows the resort where they are to stay as a two-story hotel with a bungalow theme.  The inside of the lobby is the epitome of run-down, shabby, cheap vacation kitsch.  A man wearing a pith helmet enters carrying their luggage with Larry, Balki, Mary Anne and Jennifer following, taking it all in.  "Well, here we are, Mr. Appleton," the man says as he sets their luggage down by the front desk, "Hope you enjoy yourselves.  Someone will be right with you."  He exits through a doorway.  "Well, didnít I tell you this was a great vacation package?" Larry asks, "With free transportation from the airport."  "Larry, it was a mule cart," Jennifer points out.  "I donít believe this place," Mary Anne gasps in shock.  "I donít believe it either!" Balki adds, "This is nicer than the Howellís hut in ĎGilliganís Island.í"  "Oh, come on," Larry says, "Itís island!  Itís native!"  "Itís falling apart," Jennifer adds.

"I love this place!" Balki says happily, "The whole sense of decayed elegance . . . fabulous!"  "Jennifer, itís got character," Larry says, "Besides, weíll be spending most of our time on the beach anyhow.  Come on . . . letís check in."  Larry heads for the front desk but Balki runs across to him, saying, "Oh, Cousin, Cousin, Cousin . . . can I . . . can I . . . can I . . . ring the bell?"  "Okay, you ring the bell," Larry smiles.  Balki rings the bell and smiles, saying, "Iím having fun already."  The same man who brought them to the hotel steps out, no longer wearing the pith helmet.  He steps behind the desk and says, "Well hi there!  Welcome to Club Paradise.  Iím Mac MacIntyre and you are . . . ?"  "Appleton . . . Larry Appleton," Larry answers with confusion.  "Well, weíre delighted to have you," Mac says, "Iíll just get someone to help you with your bags."  He rings the bell and calls, "Front!"  He then picks up some keys sitting in a shell and walks around the get the bags.  "Just follow me," he says.

In the next scene we see Mac leading them down a hallway to two doors.  "They shot ĎPapillioní here, you know," he tells them.  He sets their bags down and hands them two sets of keys.  "Well, here are your keys," he says, "And uh . . . I just hope that you have a wonderful weekend in Paradise.  Mi casa es su casa."  Mac walks away.  "Well thanks, Mac," Larry offers, then he turns to the girls and asks, "Well, what díya say we take a swim, go into town and shop Ďtil we drop?"  "Okay," Jennifer agrees, "Weíll change and meet you in the lobby."  Balki and Larry walk to their door while Jennifer and Mary Anne walk to theirs.  "Bye bye," Larry and Balki coyly say to the girls in unison.  "Bye bye," Jennifer and Mary coyly reply in unison.  They turn the keys in their respective locks and walk into their rooms.

On the other side of the doors we see them all walk into what is actually the same room.  They are each standing behind their doors so they canít see each other yet.  "Interesting wallpaper," Mary Anne comments.  Balki and Larry eye one another and Balki says, "Boy, these walls are thin!  It sounds like Mary Anne is right here in the room with us."  Balki and Mary Anne both step into the room and see one another as Jennifer and Larry close the doors behind them, then walk to Mary Anne and Balki before seeing each other.  "Boy, these walls really are thin!" Balki gasps, "I can see through them!  I wonder if they can see us?"  Balki starts making faces at the girls, who just stand staring in disbelief but donít react.  "No, they canít," Balki reports.  "Balki!" Jennifer says, making Balki jump back with fright.  "What are you doing in our room?" Jennifer demands to know.

"Well, weíre not in your room," Larry argues, "This is our room.  I . . . I think."  Larry and Jennifer look at their keys.  "No," Jennifer says.  "Well, letís see," Larry suggests, leading the way through the door he and Balki came through with everyone following.  "Weíre in 101 . . . youíre in 102."  They come through the door Jennifer and Mary Anne entered to find the same room.  "Wwowww!" Balki says, "This room is nicer than ours!"  "Balki," Larry says.  "Yes?"  "This is the same room," Larry informs him.  "Well, Iíll be snookered," Balki comments, then cheerfully jumps on the rather hard bed and exclaims, "Well, Cousin, this is great!  Now when you call out Jenniferís name in your sleep sheíll be right here!"  Jennifer looks at Larry in shock and Larry is embarrassed.  "Uh . . . uh, Larry, this is not going to work," Jennifer insists.  "Well, no problem," Larry assures her, "Iíll call the desk and . . . and get this all straightened out."

Larry walks to the telephone.  "Ask them to send up another bed," Mary Anne suggests.  "And another wall," Jennifer adds.  Larry waits for an answer on the phone.  "Uh, hello, Mac?  Yeah, yeah, this is Larry Appleton.  Yeah, listen . . . we only have, uh, one room and we did pay for two.  Simple math would tell us that weíre exactly one room short.  Yeah, do you get my point?  Uh huh . . . I see.  Well, let me get back to you on that."  Larry hangs up the phone.  "What did he say?" Jennifer asks.  "Well, there are two other rooms," Larry relates, "Uh, one is a little flooded . . . and the other has snakes."  Jennifer gasps.  "But theyíre not poisonous!" Larry assures her, "He said we could take our pick."  "Well, Cousin, what kind of fool would want a flooded room?" Balki asks, "Weíll take the snakes."  "Larry, you did it to us again!" Jennifer cries, "Now letís get our money back and get out of here . . . now!"

"Hey, thereís just a little problem with the accommodations," Larry says, "Iíll work it out with Mac.  Hey, this place is gonna look great from the other side of a suntan."  "This is the worst vacation Iíve had with you since the last worst vacation Iíve had with you!"  Jennifer complains sharply and she storms into the bathroom and shuts the door.  "Iíd better go talk to her," Mary Anne says, getting up and also going into the bathroom.  "Whatís with her?" Larry asks Balki.  Balki gets up from the bed and says, "Cousin, um . . . call it intuition, call it common sense, call the wind Mariah, but, I uh . . . I donít think the girls are happy here.  So, even though I love it, I . . . I think we should leave."  "Balki, I have put a lot of thought and planning into this vacation," Larry says.  "I know that, Cousin," Balki nods.

"I need your support here!  Now after we get this room thing worked out Iím sure the girls will come around."  There is a double scream from the bathroom and the girls come running out into the guysí arms.  "Thereís a . . . thereís a . . . thereís a thing in the bathtub!" Mary Anne cries.  "Well, well, relax," Larry urges, "Just relax!  In tropical climates youíve got to expect the occasional insect or bug.  Now, whatever it is, Iíll take care of it."  Larry picks up a newspaper and rolls it up, walking in a brave manner into the bathroom.  There is the sound of Larry pulling back the shower curtains and then he lets out a loud scream and comes running out of the bathroom himself, looking shaken.  "What is it, Cousin?" Balki asks.  "Well, itís either a spider . . . or a very hairy Volkswagen," Larry answers.  On their looks, the scene fades to black.

Act two begins with Larry and Balki in the lobby of the hotel playing a game of Red Hands.  "Okay, my turn," Larry says, and they put out their hands, Larryís on the bottom with his palms up and Balkiís on the top with his palms down.  "Okay, okay," Balki says.  Larry pulls his right hand out and slaps the back of Balkiís left hand.  Balki laughs as he says "Ow!" then he says, "Okay . . . okay, my turn!"  They switch hand positions.  Larry moves both hands and slaps underneath the backs of Balkiís hands.  Balki laughs.  Larry then slaps the back of Balkiís right hand.  "Ow!" Balki cries.  Larry slaps the back of Balkiís left hand.  "Ow!" Balki cries more seriously.  Larry continues to slap Balkiís hands with Balki crying "Ow!" after every hit until Balki finally gets fed up and reaches over to grab Larryís nose, making him cry, "Ow!"

"Cousin, I . . . I know weíre having the time of our lives," Balki begins, "but I . . . I donít think the girls quite share our enthusiasm for this place."  "What are you talking about?" Larry asks, "The girls are having a wonderful time."  Jennifer and Mary Anne enter.  "Larry, I hate this place," Jennifer says, "There is no swimming pool, no golf course, and you have to repel down a cliff to get to the beach."  "And I donít know why we bothered to get all dressed up, thereís nothing to do," Mary Anne adds.  "Well, that amusement park next door looked like fun," Balki points out.  "Balki, that isnít an amusement park," Jennifer corrects, "Thatís a refinery."  "Okay, okay," Larry sighs, "You wanna leave?  Weíll leave."  Mac enters, spraying the air with insecticide.  "Mosquitos," he explains, "Watch out for the dead ones.  You could turn an ankle."

"Mac, what time does the plane leave for the mainland?" Larry asks.  Mac checks his watch.  "Uh . . . twenty minutes ago.  But thereís another one tomorrow."  "All right, we can leave tomorrow," Larry says, "In the meantime, letís just try to enjoy the time weíve got here."  "You know, I think weíre all experiencing a sugar low," Balki notes, "Why we donít go into town and sample the island cuisine?"  "Now thatís the spirit, Balki," Larry agrees, "Mac?  Can you recommend a good restaurant on the island?"  "Oh, I sure could," Mac answers, and he reaches down to pick up a square board which has a tablecloth and a vase of flowers glued to it.  He walks to a small checkerboard table with four chairs and places the board over it, making it into a dining table.  "Welcome to Chez Mac," he smiles.  "Oh!" Balki says excitedly, sitting down at the table.  "Do you have reservations?" Mac asks.

"Mac . . . this is a good restaurant?" Larry asks skeptically.  "Well, this is the, uh . . . the only restaurant," Mac admits, "We did have a little Tex-Mex place on the north beach but . . . it went under last week."  "It went out of business?" Mary Anne asks.  "No, it really went under," Mac explains, "It sank.  Weíve got sinkholes all over the island."  He laughs and walks away.  "Well, well, why donít we just, uh . . . eat here?" Larry suggests, "Iíve got a good feeling about it."  "You do?" Jennifer asks, "Well, letís eat here anyway."  They all sit around the table.  Mac returns with some drinks in coconut shells with cocktail umbrellas.  "Hi, my nameís Mac.  Iím to be your waiter this evening," he says, "The specials are on the house but I will need the little umbrellas back."  He walks into the back again.  "Well, now this is nice, huh?" Larry asks, being cheerful, "This is what itís all about.  This is why you get up in the morning.  This is why you . . . "  "Put a sock in it, Larry," Jennifer stops him.

"Cousin, um . . . could . . . could I . . . could I have a private word with you?"  Larry sets down his drink and follows Balki from the table as Balki tells the girls, "Excuse us."  Balki takes Larry to sit on the couch away from the girls.  "This story is about the most pig-headed pig farmer on Mypos . . . Oinki," Balki begins, "One day, Oinki thought he had made the deal of his life on a prize pig.  Only when he got it home he discovered that it wasnít a pig at all, it was a dog in pigís clothing.  His family was going hungry because there was no bacon but Oinki was stubborn.  Even when his pig chased cars, buried bones and bit the mailman, he refused to admit heíd made a mistake.  Oinkiís family finally left him on the day his pig had puppies.  Because of his stubbornness, he had to spend the rest of his days alone."

"Whatís your point?" Larry asks.  "No matter what face you put on this hotel, itís still a dog," Balki answers, "Now Cousin, your pig-headedness is costing you your friends."  "Well, I wanted so badly for Jennifer to enjoy this trip," Larry sighs, "I thought this would be my chance to make up for the . . . "  "Yes, yes, Cousin, Cousin, Cousin," Balki interrupts, "Itís over."  They get up from the couch and return to the table.  No one says anything for a moment.  Then Larry finally admits, "All right, I booked us on a trip to Hell.  Iím sorry.  We can leave on the plane tomorrow.  And I promise never to plan another vacation again."  "Well, I guess we can make it through one night," Mary Anne says.  "Yeah, itís not the end of the world," Jennifer agrees.  "Well, at least we can spend a quiet evening and enjoy the peaceful solitude of a tropical island," Larry smiles.

The doors suddenly blow open and a raging wind blows through the lobby.  There is the sound of something ripping and tearing away.  Mac hurries from the back and says, "Sorry, the kitchenís closed," as he gathers up their coconuts.  "We just sat down," Larry points out, "How can it be closed?"  "Okay, itís not closed," Mac admits, "Itís gone.  Things like that happen in a hurricane."  He hurries away again.  "Hurricane?" Jennifer and Mary Anne cry.  "Wait, wait, wait, donít panic!" Balki urges them, "Iíve been through hurricanes on Mypos!  The first thing we have to do is find the sheep!"  They get up and run from the table.  Larry remains seated and his chair is slowly blown across the room with him in it, along with the table and chairs.

We see the hotel room where the window is blown open and everything is strewn about in disarray.  Jennifer and Mary Anne enter and are thrown by the wind against the bed, which is now stripped of all bedding and pushed against the wall.  Balki enters and tries to walk toward the window, Jennifer and Mary Anne calling, "Balki!  Balki!"  But Balki is bent backwards by the wind, also ending up falling across the bed between them.  Larry enters and sees everyone pinned to the bed.  Larry makes his way toward the window, fighting against the strong wind.  He finally makes it and somehow manages to get the window closed and locked, blocking out the wind.  "All right, weíll be fine in here," Larry announces, "I think weíve seen the worst of it."

Balki takes Mary Anneís hand and says, "Mary Anne . . . if I die, I want you to have my . . . my Wayne Newton albums."  "Thanks, Balki," Mary Anne replies, then says, "Jennifer, if I die . . . I want you to have all of my clothes and Balkiís Wayne Newton albums."  "Thank you, Mary Anne," Jennifer replies, then she gets up and walks to Larry, saying, "And Larry, if I die . . . Iím taking you with me."  "Well, now wait a minute!" Larry says, "What is all this talk about death?  We are going to be fine.  These tropical storms pass quickly.  They blow . . . and then theyíre gone."  No sooner has Larry said this than the window blows in, shattering the shutters into pieces and throwing Jennifer and Larry back across the bed.  "Balki!  Do something!" Mary Anne cries.  "Weíve got to . . . weíve got to stick something in the window to block the wind!" Balki shouts.  "The mattress!" Larry calls, "Weíll cover the window with the mattress!"

They all get up and get behind the bed, lifting the mattress up by its edge.  Slowly they push it forward, making their way toward the window.  The wind suddenly picks up and pushes all of them back across the bed with the mattress falling on top of them.  "The . . . bathroom!" Larry cries.  "Oh Cousin, you should have thought of that before the hurricane!" Balki scolds.  "No, I mean letís take cover in the bathroom!" Larry explains.  "Oh!" Balki understands.  They manage to push the mattress off of them and slowly get to their feet, Larry taking the lead and the others clinging to one another behind him in a train.  "Follow me!" Larry directs.  Clinging to each other, they make their way, step by step, to the bathroom door.  Larry opens the door to reveal the bathroom walls are completely gone and the toilet is spraying water in a geyser.  "Good news!" Balki calls, "The spiderís gone!"  The wind picks up again and pushes Mary Anne, Jennifer and Balki back to the bed, pinning them down again.

Larry hangs on to the bathroom door, fighting against the wind.  The door shuts and Larry grabs on to the wall frame, hanging on for dear life as the wind blows so hard it sweeps him off his feet.  "Larry!" Jennifer calls.  Larry ends up hanging onto the wall with his legs straight back in the air.  "Help!  Balki!  Help me!  Balki!  Balki!" Larry cries.  Balki forces his way up from the bed and goes to help Larry, calling, "Cousin!"  Balki reaches up to grab Larryís legs when the wind sweeps him off his feet as well.  Theyíre both hanging on for dear life until the wind finally subsides and they both drop to the floor.  Jennifer and Mary Anne gets up and run to them.  "Are you okay?" Mary Anne asks.  "Yeah," Balki replies.  "Oh, I . . . I think weíve finally seen the worst of it," Larry says.  The wind suddenly picks up again and suddenly one entire wall of the room breaks away, flying off into the darkness.  "Cousin!  Cousin, look!" Balki says, "You can see the refinery from here!"  They remain huddled on the floor as the wind continues to blow.

Back at the apartment, Larry and Balki enter with their suitcases.  Balki also has a gift bag.  They both look exhausted.  Larry drops his suitcase.  "Cousin, you what the best thing about going away on vacation with you is?" Balki asks.  "No, Balki, whatís that?" Larry asks.  "Coming back home alive," Balki answers, "I . . . I just love it."  They walk to the couch to sit down.  "You know," Larry begins, "I think Iím gonna take a vacation from planning vacations."  "Oh, Cousin, you donít have to do that," Balki assures him.  "I donít?" Larry asks.  "No!"  "No?"  "When the girls and I were pulling you out of that sinkhole we decided to never let you plan a trip again anyway," Balki explains.  "Iím sorry for ruining the entire weekend," Larry sighs.  "Oh come on, Cousin," Balki says, "It wasnít a complete waste of time.  I got some neat souvenirs."  "Oh, you didnít buy one of those visors from Mac, did ya?" Larry moans.  "Well, of course not.  Donít be ridiculous," Balki says, then he places the gift bag he brought with him on the coffee table and asks, "Remember that spider we saw in the bathroom?"  The bag starts to move back and forth, much to Larryís horror.

Script Variations:
There are a few differences between the Shooting Draft script dated January 11, 1990 and what aired:
According to this script, Scene "C" has been omitted.  What Scene "C" happened to be we don't know at this time, but it came between the time Mac took their bags in the lobby and when they reached their rooms.
In this version of the script, Balki is in the apartment when Larry enters with Jennifer and Mary Anne, telling them about the vacation he's planned for them.  The script notes "They have not been outside."
When Balki is trying to convince the girls to go on the trip, he tells them, "Just between (INDICATING MARY ANNE) you and me and (INDICATING JENNIFER) you and me, and (INDICATING JENNIFER AND MARY ANNE) you and you, I had a little peek at the brochure and I think we're all in for a great time."  "We are talking about Larry Appleton, aren't we?" Jennifer asks.
After Mary Anne (and not Jennifer) notes that the transportation from the airport was a mule cart, Balki says, "And wasn't it wonderful?  I felt just like the King of Mypos during his coronation parade."  "Larry, I don't believe this place," Jennifer says.  "I don't believe it, either," Balki adds, "I told you Cousin Larry wouldn't disappoint us."
When Mac comes to the front desk and asks who Larry is, Larry answers and Mac looks through the guest register.  "Wow," Balki comments, "Our mule cart driver looks just like you."  "Balki, that is our mule cart driver," Jennifer says.  "Well, that would explain the uncanny resemblance," Balki says.  When Mac comes out from behind the desk to take the bags, Jennifer follows him and Balki comments, "He certainly is a Mac-of-all-trades."  Larry and Mary Anne follow Mac but Balki stays behind to play with the bell.  Larry and Mary Anne have to come back in to take Balki away.
The Papillion line is not in this version of the script.
In this script, when Jennifer storms off to the bathroom Mary Anne follows right behind her.  "I can't believe this is happening to us again," Jennifer complains.  "Remember when we used to think Larry was the smart one?" Mary Anne comments.  (The latter line was filmed but not used)
After Larry says that the thing in the bathtub is either a spider or a very hairy Volkswagen, the scene continues.  "Larry, I will not share a bathtub with a spider that can lift the soap," Jennifer insists, "We can't stay here."  "She's got a point, Cousin," Balki agrees, "After a couple of baths we're bound to get emotionally attached to the little guy.  Come time to leave, they won't let us take him home.  Who needs the heartache?"  "Okay, fine," Larry says, "You all want to leave, go ahead.  I'll just stay here and have a great time all by myself."  Balki and the girls pick up their bags and head for the door.  "Okay, okay," Larry says, "So the rooms aren't as plush as I expected."  "Or as numerous," Balki adds.  "What do you want me to do?" Larry cries, "Eat dirt?  The island is still beautiful.  What do you say we spend three days enjoying it?"  Balki and the girls look at each other then drop their bags and come back into the room.  "I'll give you three hours," Jennifer warns, "If things don't improve, we're out of here.  Come on, Mary Anne, let's find the pool."  Mary Anne follows Jennifer, saying, "I hope it's not that smelly, stagnant thing we passed on the way in."  The girls exit.  Larry starts unpacking and tells Balki, "See, I told you they'd come around."
At the beginning of act two, Balki and Larry are playing checkers instead of Red Hands (there is a checkerboard in the lobby in the filmed episode).  The checkers are made up of black and white shells.  Balki jumps several of Larry's shells.  "King me," he says and Larry does.
After Jennifer tells Balki it's not an amusement park next door but a refinery, Mary Anne says, "No wonder they didn't have a gift shop."
After Mac opens "Chez Mac" and asks Balki, "Do you have reservations?" Balki replies, "Well, I do have one reservation: It would be nice if you'd put those little paper strips across the toilet seat."  When Mac talks about the restaurant that went under the week before, it's a sushi place and not a Tex-Mex place.
After Larry says he has a good feeling about eating at "Chez Mac," Jennifer says, "Well, I'm hungry.  Let's eat here anyway."
When Balki takes Larry aside, Larry says, "Balki, if this is a Mypos story, now is not the time."  "Cousin, just hear me out," Balki asks, "and I'm sure you'll see the allegory is quite apropos."  Balki tells the story of Oinki.  After he tells how Oinki had actually bought a dog in pig's clothing, he says, "Now, here's where the story takes a tragic turn."  "Good.  I was losing interest," Larry says.  After Balki says that Oinki spent the rest of his life alone, he adds, "Even his dog ran away when Oinki tried to curl its tail."
The hurricane scene is mostly the same, except there are no references to them being pinned against the bed.  After Larry says "These storms pass quickly.  They blow and then their gone," the shutters blow off the wall and a palm tree comes through the window.  "And then they blow again," Larry adds.  After Balki says they need to stick something in the window to block the wind, Jennifer says, "How about Larry?"  The rest of the scene is the same, except at the end the directions say "Larry is hit in the face with a palm frond."
The last scene is the same as what aired.

Continue on to the next episode . . .