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The Untitled Project of Mypos


The carriage then pulled up in front of a mud hut on a hillside.  The driver said something to Balki in Myposian.  Balki responded.  He then lightly tapped Kelsey to wake her up.  “Kelsey we're here.”  Balki said quietly.  He did the same thing to Larry.

“Great.”  Larry said in his snobbish tone as he got up and got off.  Balki and Kelsey followed.  The driver was getting their luggage off.

“Whew!”  Kelsey said as she stretched.  “Balki this is your Mama's house?”  Kelsey asked looking at the mud hut.

“Yep this is where my childhood grew up.”  Balki said proudly.

“I'm waiting.”  Larry said impatiently.

“Okay Kelsey you wait here. I want to surprise Mama with you.”  Balki instructed.

“Okay.”  Kelsey said trying not to show her nerves.  She had heard a lot about Mama.  How she can have temper on her but yet be the sweetest old lady in the world.  Kelsey just hoped her mood was in a good one today for Mama meeting her.

Balki and Larry walked up to the door and knocked.  A lady on the other side of the door could be heard humming.  The door opened and a heavy-set lady stood there in a long, floral print dress.  “Oh! Balki, my babki!”  Mama said as she was holding her arms out.

“Mama!”  Balki said as he met his mother arms and they shared a warmly hug.

Mama did the same to Larry.  “Larry-kins!”

“Hi Mama, it’s good to see you.”  Larry said half-heartily hugging Mama back.

“Something wrong with Larry?”  Mama asked.

“Long storyline.”  Balki said.

“Ahh”  Mama said as she already knew the situation without Balki explaining it.  “Well come on in.”  Mama said as she picked up her son’s bag and turned to walk in.

“Wait Mama, I have a surprise for you.”  Balki said he stopped Mama.

“I am getting a washer that washes dishes?”  Mama asked excitedly.

“Uh no, Mama.”  Balki said.

“You got Mama a new sweater?”  Mama guessed again.

“No again Mama.”  Balki said.

“You finally got Mama the scuba gear she wanted.”  Mama guessed again.

“No again Mama.”  Balki said.

“Well what is it?!”  Mama screeched.

“Come on out!”  Balki called out.

Kelsey came out and walked to the front door.  “Mama this is Kelsey. This who I have been writing to you about.  Kelsey this is my Mama.”  Balki said as he introduced Kelsey to Mama.

“Nice to meet you Mrs. Bartokomous.”  Kelsey said as she extended her arm out to shake Mama’s hand.

“No, no Kelsey everyone calls Mama Mama.  My Mama is your Mama.”  Balki explained.

“Oh!  Nice to meet you Mama.”  Kelsey repeated.

Mama was saying ‘yes’ to herself as she walked up to Kelsey.  “Keliki.”  Mama said.  Then she grabbed the top of her front teeth and pulled them.  

Kelsey laughed sheepishly and turned to Balki with a puzzled look on her face.  “That’s Mama’s way of showing she likes you.”  Balki explained.  

Mama let go of Kelsey’s teeth and said something in Myposian.  “Mama said for us to come in.”  Balki translated.

As Mama, Larry, and Kelsey went in, Balki went over to tell the driver and said he can leave for the night and come back in the morning and got the luggage and carried it in.  Balki walked in, sat the luggage down, and shut the door.  Mama was in the kitchen finishing up dinner.  “Kelsey you are going to stay in my old room. I’m going to put your things in there.”  Balki said.

“Wait Balki, where are you going to sleep?”  Kelsey asked.

“Oh don’t worry about me, Cousin Larry and I are going to sleep on the hammocks Mama got for us.”  Balki said.

“Balki I feel bad to take your room.”  Kelsey said.

“Oh no, no it’s okay.  It is said whenever a Mypiot invites an American to their home they’re supposed to give up their room.”  Balki explained.  

“Wait, Balki when I came to Mypos the first time I didn’t get your room.”  Larry said.

“Oh Cousin that’s because you’re family, it is not said for a Mypiot to give their room to a family member.”  Balki said.

Larry just shook his head with frustration, picked up his bags, and went into the living room.

Balki and Kelsey walked into Balki’s bedroom.  It was very much similar to his bedroom in Chicago.  It was lavishly decorated with Myposian artifacts and decorations.  The bed was under a canopy curtain with Myposian blankets on it.  There was a Myposian rug on the floor.  There was even a huge tapestry hanging on wall.  “Wow, Balki your room is very…usual.”  Kelsey said as she looked around.

“I hope you will be comfortable in here.”  Balki said as he sat Kelsey’s bags down.

“Oh I’m sure I will.”  Kelsey said.

“Oh look who I brought.”  Balki said as he opened his bag.  He pulled out Dimitri and Kristi.

“Oh you brought Dimitri and Kristi!”  Kelsey said.

“Of course I did, I couldn’t leave them there by themselves.  They would’ve been lonely.  I’m going to put them here on the shelf.”  Balki said.  

“Okay.”  Kelsey said.

“Okay, I’m going to leave you so you can get settled in.”  Balki said.


“Mama is getting dinner ready, it should be done soon.”  Balki said.

“Okay.”  Kelsey said.

Balki then shut the door.  He then walked into the living room.  “Well Cousin, Kelsey is getting herself settled in.”  Balki said.

“That’s wonderful.”  Larry said sarcastically.

Balki then went into the kitchen to see if Mama needed help.  “Mama, do you need any helpiki?”  Balki asked.

“No, no helpiki.  Just sit down and relax.”  Mama instructed.  Balki went into the living and sat down on the couch.  Kelsey came out the bedroom and sat down on the couch as well.  “Hey Larry, how you doing? Feeling any better?”  Kelsey asked.

“No!”  Larry stressed.

Kelsey sighed and turned back to Balki.   “So Balki, did you tell Mama about the documentary yet.”  Kelsey asked.

“Shhh!  No not yet, I want to mention it to her later after everything settles down with us coming up here.”  Balki whispered.

“Come and get it!”  Mama called as she hit the metal triangle.

Balki and Kelsey got up and went into the kitchen.  Larry slowly followed behind.

“Here Kelsey, you sit here between Mama and I.”  Balki said as he pulled out Kelsey’s chair.

“Thank you Balki.”  Kelsey said as she sat down.  Kelsey then sniffed the air.  “What’s that unusual smell?”  She asked.

“That’s the pig stomach Mama is boiling for her famous pig stew.  The pig stomach has to boil for a whole day to get the full flavor of the stew.”  Balki explained.

“Oh, okay.  Well what are we having tonight?”   Kelsey asked.

“Ding-ding machmud.”  Balki said.

“Oh I finally get to taste ding-ding machmud!”  Kelsey said excitedly.

“Yes and from one of the persons that makes the best ding-ding machmud in the world.”  Balki said.

Mama came over to the table humming with the pan in her hand.  “Here’s some for you.”  She said as she put some on Kelsey’s plate.  She then went around to Larry and put some on his plate.  “Here’s some for you.”  She said.  “And here is some for my little baklava.”  Mama said as she put some on Balki’s plate.  Mama then put some on her plate and sat down.  Mama then raises her glass and said, “Signifiki clinki tinki Balki.”

“What does that mean?”  Kelsey asked.

“That means to make a toast.”  Balki explained.

“Oh!”  Kelsey said as she raised her glass.

Balki then stood up.  “Cousin you too.”  Balki demanded.

Larry uncaringly raised his glass.

“I would like to make this toast to the lady love of my life Kelsey, who has flown a long way from home to visit my home and to meet the other lady love of my life, my Mama.  Here, here to Kelsey.  Boing boing boing boing.”  Balki let his voice trail off.

“Wow Balki, I wasn’t expecting that.  Thank you.”  Kelsey said in awe.

Balki sat back down.  “So Keliki.  Where you from in America?”  Mama asked.

“Well I am from the mid-west but I now live in LA.”

“LA?”  Mama said.  Then she began singing the lyrics to the song “I Love LA.”  Balki cut Mama off.  Mama than began singing the lyrics to Tony, Toni, Tone song “It Never Rains in Southern California.”  Balki cut Mama off again.  Mama then turned her attention back to Kelsey.  “You met Balki in Chicago?”  She asked.

“Yes ma’am.”  Kelsey said.

“Balki a good gentleman?”

“Yes ma’am he’s a great gentleman.  You raised a perfectly well, groomed son.”  Kelsey complemented.

“Balki just seem to glow whenever he mentions you.”  Mama said.

Kelsey smiled at Balki.

“How you like Mypos so far?”  Mama asked.

“Oh I love it.  Everyone seems so nice and the scenery is just beautiful.  I would definitely come back if I have the opportunity.”  Kelsey said.  

“Where did you get the vest?”  Mama asked as she noticed it.

“Balki made it for me as a present.  Do you like it?”  Kelsey asked.

“Yes.  Very prettyliki.”  Mama said.

“Thank you Mama.”  Kelsey said.

“Well if Balki likes you, I like you.”  Mama said.  Mama then turned to her son.

Balki put his hand on top of Mama’s hand.  “Thank you Mama.”  Balki said.


Later that night everyone was getting ready for bed.  “How did you enjoy dinner?”  Balki asked.

“It was great. Very filling.”  Kelsey said.

“Wait till you try Mama’s pig stew.  Now that is something that sticks to your ribs.”  Balki said.  “Tomorrow I’ll take you into town and you can get more footage and souvenirs if you want.”

“Okay.”  Kelsey said.

“I would like Cousin Larry to come but I’m sure he doesn’t want too.”  Balki said sadly.

“Yeah what’s wrong with Larry?  He’s been grumpy since you guys landed in LA.”  Kelsey said.

“He didn’t want to come here.”  Balki said.

“Why not?”  Kelsey asked.

“Because of the living style here and there was a big story he really wanted to cover.”

“Oh.”  Kelsey said understanding.

“Even though I am happy to come home and see Mama I wished he was enjoying it as much as I am.”  Balki said sadly.

“Don’t worry, I’ll talk to Larry.”  Kelsey said.

Balki and Kelsey shared a moment.  Then Balki leaned to hug Kelsey, but Kelsey made the move first and gave him a passionate hug that almost knocked him off the bed.  “Wwoww!”  Balki said.  “Well goodnight Kelsey.”  Balki said as he got up off the bed.

“Goodnight Balki.”  Kelsey said.

“I hope you sleep well.”  Balki said.

“I’m sure I will.”  Kelsey said.

“I’ll be in the living room if you need anything.”  Balki said.

“Okay.”  Kelsey replied.

Balki then turn on a nightlight and closed the door.  He walked into the living room where Larry was trying to get situated in the hammock.  “Well Kelsey’s all tucked in and Mama is already in dreamland.”  Balki said.

“That’s great.”  Larry said sarcastically.

“Cousin, you been a grumpy man since we left Chicago.”  Balki said.

“Of course I have been a grumpy man because I was taken away from real civilization and a big story I have been long waiting to get.  And every step of this trip has been a disaster.  I had to pay extra for luggage, I missed the opportunity of riding in first class, my bottom is still sore from the first carriage ride, I am eating pig parts, and now I am sleeping in a swinging hammock like a monkey.  So yes I will continue to be a grumpy man until we go back to Chicago!  Goodnight!”  Larry said angrily.

“Okay Cousin. Goodnight.”  Balki said meekly.

Balki turned off the light and climbed into his hammock with no problem.  Larry had trouble getting into his.  He put one foot in while he balanced with the other one.  Once he had his balance he put the other food in carefully.  He was in fully.  He then sighed with relief and pulled the blanket on him.  But the slightest move he made put him on the floor.

Balki looked over his shoulder to see his cousin on the floor.  “Need some help?”  Balki asked sarcastically.

“No I am fine.”  Larry replied lying on the floor.


The next morning Larry got up.  He went into the kitchen.  Mama was in there.  “Good morning Mama.”  Larry said.

“Good morning Larry-kins.”  Mama said.  “Did you sleep well?”

“No not really.”  Larry sighed.

“I can tell. You were still on the floor.”  Mama reminded Larry.

“Thanks for reminding me.  Where is Balki?”  Larry asked.

“He took Keliki into town to show her around.”  Mama replied.

“Oh.”  Larry said.

“Want some breakfast?”  Mama asked.

“No thanks, I’ll just have coffee with goat’s milk.”  Larry said.

“Larry-kins you need to eat something; you hardly touched your dinner yesterday.”  Mama said.

“Thanks Mama, but the coffee is plenty.”  Larry said as he poured his coffee.

“You be full as a tick when my pig stew sticks to your ribs.”  Mama said as she resumed what she was doing.

Larry just made a face as he walked into the living room.


“Balki this is great of all the footage that I am getting of the town.  Seeing how the vendors run their carts, people shopping and dining.  And oh Mount Mypos was to die for.”  Kelsey said.

“Mount Mypos was to die for when the war was going on years ago.”  Balki informed.

“Well it is the place to be to see the entire island or considered the romantic place to take a special someone.”  Kelsey hinted.

Balki and Kelsey smiled.  They snapped back into reality.  “Well let’s go into town square and then we can head home.”  Balki said.

“Okay!”  Kelsey replied.


Back at the house Larry was watching a Myposian soap opera.  He had no idea what was going on.  Mama walked into the living room wiping her hands on her apron.

“Oh!  You are watching All My Sheepherders.”  Mama said as she looked at the TV.

All My Sheepherders?”  Larry asked.

“Yes, and next is As the Wool Turns but let me know when Days of the Livestock comes on, I have to see if the wool maker committed all those killings that was going around town today.”  Mama said as she went back into the kitchen.  Larry just shook his head.

Just then Balki and Kelsey walked in.  “Hi Mama we’re back!”  Balki said.

“How was your trip into town?”  Mama asked.

“Great!  I took Kelsey around and showed her some of the vendors and she was able to buy a couple of souvenirs.”  Balki said.

“Did you all go up to Mount Mypos?  You’ve had to have taken her up there.”  Mama said.

“Yes Mama, I did-.”  Balki said but Mama cut him off.

“Aaah the memories your daddy and I shared up there.”  Mama said as she reminisced.

“Balki am I going to go put these things away and get ready.”  Kelsey said.

“Okay.”  Balki said.  Kelsey left the room.  “Ohhh Mama is that the pig stew?”  Balki asked as his hand were reaching for the pot.  Mama slapped Balki’s hand and start screeching in Myposian like no tasting till dinner.  Balki rubbed is sore hand.

Kelsey was heading to Balki’s room when she ran into Larry in the hallway.  “Hi Larry!”  She said.

“Hi Kelsey.”  Larry said in his same unfriendly tone.

That was it, the last straw.  Now was the time to tell Larry about himself.  “You know Larry; ever since you guys landed in LA you have been acting like a jerk.”  Kelsey informed.  Larry gave a hurtful look and tried to state his case, but Kelsey put her hand up.  “Please, let me finish.  Now you and I are fortunate when we want to go visit our love ones we can just hop on a plane, train, bus, or even get in our car and drive if we want too. But not Balki, he has to travel hundreds, thousands of miles to see his mama who he only gets to see maybe once a year if even that.  You know what Balki told me the other night?  He said, 'Even though I am so happy to be back in my hometown and see Mama and everybody else what would make this trip perfect if Cousin Larry was enjoying it like I am enjoying it.'  I mean there was so much desperation in his voice when he told me that.  Now grant it Mypos is not the glam life, but its Balki’s glam life and I think you should go along with it while we’re here, not just for my or Mama’s sake but for Balki’s sake.  Remember it’s just temporary.”  Kelsey said as she finished her speech.  She then went into the room and left Larry to think about what she said.

Once again and as usual Kelsey was right.  He had been acting like a slimeball the entire time while they had been there and throughout the whole trip.  Now was the time to do what he disliked to do: apologize to Balki.  He walked into the living room.  He let out a big sigh as he saw Balki sitting on the couch tying his shoes.  “Hey Balki.”  Larry said as he approached him.  “Whatcha doing?”  He asked.

“Hey Cousin, I’m getting ready to show Kelsey how to herd sheep.”  Balki said.

“I see.”  Larry said.

“But I’ll hurry up and get out of your way.”  Balki said as he quickly got up.

“No, wait Balki.”  Larry said as he stopped him.  “Here sit down.”  Larry said as he motioned them to sit down.  They sat down.  “I know have been acting insensitive, inconsiderate, rude, a slimeball, stop me anytime.”  Larry said.

“No, you’re doing fine.”  Balki assured him.

“But most of all of all those names I’d said I have been acting like a jerk and I am sorry and I’m going to try to make the most of the rest of this trip.”  Larry said sincerely.

Balki put his hand on Larry’s knee.  “Ohh Cousin, thank you.  You’re not a jerk, but I’m glad you saw that.”  Balki said.

Larry just gave an uneasy friendly smile.

“Hey!  You want to come outside and herd sheep with us; it’s been a while since you have.”  Balki said.

“No thanks, I’ll just hold the camera while you teach Kelsey.”  Larry said.

Balki quickly shushed Larry then turned around to see if Mama was around.  “I haven’t told Mama that we are doing the documentary yet.”  Balki said in a whispered voice.  “We’re going to spring it up on her tonight at dinner.”

“Okay Balki, I’m ready.”  Kelsey said as she walked out in attire fit to herd sheep.

“Oh Wwow!  Kelsey you look fabulous to herd sheep.”  Balki said.

“I do?”  Kelsey asked kind of embarrassed.

“Yes.”  Balki replied.

“Looks like something was going on here before I came in.”  Kelsey said.

“Yes.”  Balki said as he was putting his arm Larry.  “Cousin Larry was just apologizing and saying he is going to make the most out the rest of the trip.”  Balki explained.

Kelsey folded her arms and said, “Well I am very happy to hear that.”

Larry gave a smile and friendly wink to Kelsey and Kelsey winked back showing that they were in on the secret.

“Well come, let’s get the sheep herding lesson underway.”  Balki said.

Larry picked the camera bag.  They all headed for the door.

“Wait!  Where you all going?”  Mama asked as she stopped them.

“We all are going to teach Kelsey how to herd sheep.”  Balki answered.

“Okay but be careful.  I don’t want to pay to rent a sheep dog to come and retrieve my sheep.”  Mama scolded.

“Yes Mama.”  Balki said innocently.

“Also dinner is in one hour.”  Mama reminded them.

“Yes Mama.”  Balki said.

The trio went out into the back yard.

An hour later the trio came back in.  Kelsey was out of breath.  “Kelsey you did well.”  Balki said.

“Did well?!  Balki the sheep kept running away from me.  It was like I was the big bad wolf.”  Kelsey explained.

“Well at least you herd one sheep.”  Balki said.

“That was because he was a baby and one of the sheep was chasing him.”  Kelsey said frustrated.  “I-I’m going to go change.”  Kelsey said in a disappointed tone.

“Poor Kelsey.”  Larry said.

“Cousin she wasn’t as bad as you were when you first herded sheep.”  Balki said.

“Thanks Balki.”  Larry said sarcastically.

“We did get some good footage though of the sheep herding for the documentary.”  Balki said.

“Yes it’s really going to be neat for people to see how Mypiots herd sheep.”  Larry said.

“Let’s go have dinner.”  Balki said.

Everybody went and sat down at the dinner table.  It was all set up.  Everybody sat down.

“So Keliki, how was the sheep herding?”  Mama asked as she was putting her napkin in her lap.

“Well…let’s just say sheep herding is not my forte.”  Kelsey said.

“Did a bad job huh?”  Mama came right out and asked.

“Yeah.”  Kelsey said admittingly.

“Don’t worry Keliki.  Sheep herding is not easy.  It took me a while to get used to it.”  Mama said sincerely.

“Really?”  Kelsey asked.

“After a year or two you get used to it.”  Mama said as she took a bite of the food.

Kelsey just gave Balki a confused look.

“So Keliki, what do you do in America?”  Mama asked.

“Well I am an actress.”  Kelsey said.

“Ohh!  ‘To Be or Not To Be.  That is the question.’”  Mama said.

“Uh no Mama, I acting in front of the camera as well as behind the camera, like voice-over work.”  Kelsey corrected.

“Actually Mama the reason Kelsey is here filming a documentary about Mypos.”  Balki said.

“Yes Mama and I was wondering if you would be willing to be a part of the documentary?”  Kelsey asked.

Mama put her spoon down and rose to her feet very angrily staring at Kelsey.  Kelsey looked worried.

“Mama? What the biggi dealiki?”  Balki asked.

“What’s the biggi dealiki?!  There will be no documentriki made at all on or about Mypos!”  Mama said angrily.  She then ran out the kitchen sobbing.

Balki, Larry, and, Kelsey sit at the table looking confused.  “I better go and check on her.”  Balki said as he got up from the table.


A few moments later Balki came back into the kitchen where Larry and Kelsey still were.  Kelsey got up and quickly hurried over to Balki.  “Balki, what did she say?  Why can’t the documentary be made?”  Kelsey asked in a rushed tone.

“W-well she didn’t say at all.  She just yelled at little bit more and continued to cry.”  Balki explained.

“Ohh no!  What am I going to do?  The production company is expecting me to come back with full footage for a documentary.”  Kelsey explained.  

“Kelsey don’t you have enough footage that you have already?”  Larry asked.

“Not enough for it to be considered a documentary.”  Kelsey said.  “What am I going to do now?  If I don’t come back with a full documentary I am going to lose my job.  Balki you have to go back in there and ask her why she is not letting this happen.”  Kelsey pleaded.

“I would love to but if I go back in there expect me not to come back out.  Mama is like a hurricane when she is angry.”  Balki explained.

“If you excuse me, I am going to go to my room.”  Kelsey said as she left.

“Welp this vacation just got better.”  Larry said in a kind of sarcastic tone.

“Cousin!”  Balki said as he scolded Larry.  “We got to think of a way to help Kelsey.”  He said.

“Balki how are we going to do that?  We can’t make Mama change her mind.”  Larry said.

“We have done it before?”  Balki said.

“Yes with a lot of effort too that was not easy.”  Larry reminded.

“Cousin we got to get that documentary made somehow.”  Balki said.  “I’m going to go check on Kelsey.”  He said as he left the room.

“So much for dinner.”  Larry muttered quietly as he got up and took dishes to the sink.

Balki knocked on the door.  “Kelsey, are you alright?”  Balki asked.

Kelsey was sitting on the bed fiddling with one of the sheep.  “No.  Just sitting here thinking about a wonderful career I had.”  Kelsey said.

“You still have your career.”  Balki said as he came in and sat down on the bed.

“Not when I go back to America.  I wish now I never decided to do this documentary.”  Kelsey said.

“Don’t say that!”  Balki demanded.

“Why not?  The project is ruined now and I don’t know why Mama doesn’t even want it done.  It just doesn’t make sense.”  Kelsey said.

“I’m sure whatever the reason is Mama has to have a good explanation for it.”  Balki said.

“But what is it?  Balki we only have a few days left here.”  Kelsey said.

Balki was at a loss for words.  They just stared at each other.

“Balki if you don’t mind I-I would like to be alone now.”  Kelsey said as she got in the bed and curled up.

Balki got up and went to the door and stop.  Kelsey’s back was facing the door.  He quietly shut it.  He felt so helpless.  He walked into the living room.

“Is she okay?”  Larry asked.

“She’s still upset.  Cousin, what are we going to do?”  Balki asked.

We are not going to do anything.  Balki you know how opinionated your mother can be and this time she’s not even stating it.  You just have to face it and call this one a loss. You can’t help out on this one.”  Larry stated.

Balki hated hearing that.  He hated when he couldn’t help out the people he cared about.

“So Balki let’s just enjoy the rest of the time we have here and get ready to head back to America.”  Larry said as he climbed into his hammock.  

“Okay Cousin.”  Balki said upsettingly turning out the light.

Larry pulled the covers up and went to sleep.  Balki didn’t fall asleep as quickly.  He just turned over on his side and stared out.


During the night Kelsey wanted a snack since she didn’t eat much during dinner.  She got up quietly and opened the door.  She had to walk through the living room to get to the kitchen.  On her way she saw Balki and Larry soundly asleep.  When she got there she opened the refrigerator door and saw there were some bibbibakas left over from dinner.  She grabbed one and poured herself a glass of blue juice.  She went over to the table and sat down and started thinking.  She thought about why Mama wouldn’t allow her to do the documentary.  She really did not have enough footage to turn in either.  It was more enough to be turned into a pamphlet.  The more she thought about it the more she got upset.  She all of a sudden wasn’t hungry anymore.  She just stared at the bibbibabka.

All of a sudden the kitchen light came on.  “Mama!”  Kelsey said startled.

“Keliki, what are you doing up?”  Mama asked as she walked further into the kitchen.

“I just wanted a little snack.”  Kelsey said.

“Oh because you didn’t eat dinner this evening.”  Mama reminded her.

“Yes Mama.”  Kelsey said admitting.

“I think I’ll join you.”  Mama said as she pulled a mug out and pulled herself a cup of goat’s milk and got a bibbibabka.  She pulled up a chair at the table.

Kelsey looked at Mama then looked away.  It was like she wanted to ask her something but couldn’t.  She finally came out and asked it.  “Mama why don’t you want this documentary to be made?  It would be a great educational tool for American children to learn about this great, little island.”  Kelsey explained.

Mama didn’t say anything.

“Please tell me, Mama.”  Kelsey begged.

Mama continued to look down then looked at Kelsey.  She had a look of desperation on her face.  She let out a big sigh.  “Mypos is a quiet, family orientated island and I don’t want it to be exposed with negativity with that documentary.”  Mama explained.

“That wouldn’t happen Mama because the channel it would be airing is strictly for educational purposes.”  Kelsey explained.

Mama looked down again.

“Mama I don’t think that’s the reason why you don’t want this documentary to be made.”  Kelsey sensed.

Mama hesitated again.  “I’m kind of shy in front of the camera now.”  Mama said quietly.

“Shy in front of the camera?  Balki told me you used to be a Glamour Girl back in the day.”  Kelsey chuckled.

“I don’t like how I look now.”  Mama said quietly.

Kelsey stopped chuckling.  She reached out and touched Mama’s hand.  “Oh Mama, I’m-I’m sorry.  A woman’s appearance really means something to her.  It shows her confidence, shows she has all the power in the world, she can do anything and when it’s gone it seems like to her none of that even exist.  I just have to say Mama you are beautiful inside and out.  You have raised an amazing son and is the epitome of this island.  Now I know that means nothing coming from me but it’s the truth.”  Kelsey said sincerely.

Mama let out a little smile.  Kelsey scooted her chair over a little further.  “Tell you what.  I’ll make a deal with you.  How about I help you feel beautiful, sort of like a make-over and if I succeed will you allow the documentary to continue and if I don’t succeed we can forget all about the documentary but still be willing to help you feel beautiful.”  Kelsey explained.

Mama thought for a second then said, “Okay Keliki, I will allow that.”  Mama agreed.

“Yay!”  Kelsey said happily as she got up and hugged Mama.

“What’s going on in here?”  Balki said as he walked into the kitchen yawning and rubbing his eyes.

“Oh nothing.”  Kelsey said.  “Just girl talk.”  She continued.

“That’s right, girl talk.”  Mama said.

“Ohh I see.”  Balki said.

“You want something while you’re up?”  Mama asked.

“No Mama I’m fine.”  Balki said.

“I’ll make you a glass of warm goat milk; you always use to like that when you wake up during the night.”  Mama said as she got up.

“Mama that’s okay I don’t-.”Balki said.

“I’m making it!!”  Mama screeched.

Balki quickly grabbed a chair at the table.  “I’m still trying to come up with a way for the documentary to be made.”  Balki whispered.

“It’s okay, I have come with…”

“Oh God.”

“A plan.”  Kelsey said.

“You’ve been hanging around Cousin Larry too much.”  Balki said.  “Well what is it?”  He asked.

“I’m not telling, don’t worry, I got this.”  Kelsey said.

“Here’s your milk.”  Mama said as she brought it over to the table.  As he drunk it he gave Kelsey a skeptical look while she had a mischievous smile on her face.


“Where could Mama and Kelsey be?”  Balki said as he paced back and forth.  “They have been gone for hours.”  He continued.

“Well did Kelsey say where they were going?”  Larry asked.

“All she said was she had a plan on how the documentary was going to get finished and they were going to the Macy’s of Mypos, and that’s it.”  Balki explained.

“Hmm, that’s interesting.”  Larry said.

“Yeah, I told her she’s been hanging around you too much coming up with plans.”  Balki said.  Larry gave him a look.  “I just hope hers works.”  Balki continued then sat down on the couch.

“We only have a couple more days here.  How is she going to pull it off?”  Balki wondered as he jumped back up.

“Kelsey is a very creative young lady.  I’m sure she will come up with something.”  Larry said as he opened the paper except he could read it because it was all in Myposian.

There was a little bit of silence.

“Kelsey really has me sitting on sticks and needles.”  Balki said as he sat back down.

Just then the front door flung opened.  “And now lad-gentlemen and gentlemen may I present the most beautiful woman in all of Mypos.”  Kelsey said in a game show voice.  “Mama Bartokomous!”

Mama stepped in the doorway wearing a very beautiful, elegant dress, with elegant shoes with elegant jewelry and elegant purse.

“Mama!”  Balki said surprised as he and Larry got up from the couch.  “You look beautiful!”  Balki said.

“Doesn’t she look gorgeous?”  Kelsey said smiling at the wonderful job she did.

“Thank you.”  Mama said bashfully.

“But Mama I don’t understand.  Why are you all dressed up?  It’s not the annual sheep ball?”  Balki asked.

Kelsey stepped in.  “Well Balki sometimes a girl needs to show and be reminded of how beautiful she looks, not just on the outside but on the inside as well.”

“Oh I see.”  Balki said as he knew what Kelsey was talking about.  Balki walked up to Mama.  “Mama, I think you are very beautiful, inside and out.”  Balki said sincerely.

“Thank you my babki.”  Mama said smiling.

“Yes Mama, I have to say you look very elegant.”  Larry said as he walked up to Mama.

Mama gave both of them a hug.  As Mama was hugging them she looked at Kelsey and gave her a smile and a thumb’s up.


“So as you can see even today Mypos is still the quiet little island where everybody who knows your name helps everybody, and after so many years of tradition, things are still done the traditional Myposian way, and as always will be beautiful.”

Balki turned the TV off.  “Wwow!  Cousin.  Kelsey did a wonderful job on the documentary.”  Balki said.

“She sure did.”  Larry agreed.

“And she didn’t sugar coat the facts like you normally do.”  Balki added.  Larry gave Balki a look.  “I’m so happy I had an opportunity to go home.”  Balki said.

“I’m glad you were able too.”  Larry said as he smiled.

“Thank you cousin.”  Balki said.  “I’m happy Kelsey had the opportunity to go as well.”  Balki said.

“Me too, she really seemed to have enjoyed herself.”  Larry replied.

“And that the documentary was able to get finished.”  Balki said.

“And see we didn’t have to interfere either.”  Larry reminded.

“And you were still able to get the story you wanted too.”  Balki said.

“Yeah things seemed to have worked out.”  Larry said as he let a sigh.

“Cousin, you know I didn’t know Mama was feeling like that though.”  Balki said.

“It’s really hard to know what women be going through, sometimes they like to express their emotions and sometimes they like to hold it in and when they do express them it’s mostly not a pretty sight.”  Larry said.

“Well from now on when I write Mama I am going to tell her how beautiful she is in every letter.”  Balki said.

“That’s a good idea.  I think I’m going to do that for my mother as well.”  Larry thought.

“You know you better call Kelsey and see how she is doing.”  Larry reminded Balki.

“Oh you’re right Cousin.”  Balki said as he jumped up from the couch and went to the phone.  Balki dialed her number and waited.  “No answer.” Balki said as he hung up.  “That’s strange.”  Larry said.

“Well she was so worn out; I guess she is catching up on her beauty sleep.”  Balki said as he joked.